I have decided not to accept the Secret Service entourage for my campaign.  I declined the service because the people have to come first.  If somebody wants to assassinate me, he or she will have to realize that I will be made a martyr. Issues that nobody cares about right now like shutting down the “CineMafia” and making Vanna White’s birthday a national holiday will suddenly be issues everybody cares about.

I like to wear black suits and sunglasses.  Nothing is more embarrassing than having a supporter come up to me and ask, “Are you one of those Secret Service guys protecting Ahmnodt Heare?”

I would like to thank the Secret Service for thinking I should be protected.  I don’t think I really need the service, though.