Ahmnodt Heare for President

Ahmnodt Heare For America… Ahmnodt Heare For You.

Universal Appeal

Being President of the United States means just that:  Being the President of the United States.  It’s not just leading people who pay taxes or people who don’t pay taxes.  It’s not just being the President of those who vote for me or don’t vote for me.

It is because of these things that I try to campaign to everybody and not just to the demographics who might vote for me.  While there might be a lot of strippers, exchange students, and zombies, those groups alone are not enough to get me elected.  (Though it would make Delaware very close.)

I am campaigning to bankers, librarians, doctors, and WNBA players despite the possibility that I will not receive a vote from anybody in those demographics.  I will be their President as well as everybody else’s.  I will campaign to the 53% who pay income taxes and the 47% who supposedly do not.

It is not the case that I want to be President more than I want to get laid.  It’s that America needs me to be President more than I need to breathe.  No other candidate has mentioned the ill effects that the Cinemafia has caused on American Entertainment.  None have kept a watchful eye on the Canadian government as I have.

Please forgive my desperate pleas for your votes.  It will only be for another seven weeks.

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September 18, 2012 - Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, commentary, election, humor, satire, taxes, voting | , , , , , ,

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