News From the Campaign Trail

This is my first time seriously campaigning since the infamous brownie incident in Louisville last month.  Unfortunately, I had lost some ground.  It seems that too many people are content on voting for John McCain or Barack Obama. 

I am told that I am a “good fellow”, that my heart is “in the right place”, and I “have a few good ideas.”  I am also told that these are “serious times” and we need a “serious leader” with “a chance” of winning.

Why are the Democrats and Republicans the only parties with “a chance?”  They are the causes of all of America’s ills.  Every failed policy in the last 100 years has been authored by Democrats and Republicans.  Do you want to give them another chance?

On the bright side, I did do some campaigning at maternity wards to the newborns for my 2028 campaign.  They all seemed to like my ideas.  There was one baby who cried, but only because she pooped in her pants.

Don’t forget my show on Sunday is the Christmas Special.  10:00 Eastern, 9PM Central on http://www.blogtalkradio.com/Ahmnodt-Heare .

 

Why Democrats Should Vote for Ahmnodt Heare

1)War – Barack Obama wants to send troops to Pakistan.  I want to send them to Canada to fight during the day and to come home at night.  It would be hard to send all of our troops home from Pakistan every night.

2)Economy – Barack Obama wants to tax the rich.  I want to tax everybody 100%.  While that doesn’t sound popular, my plan allows people to get a good portion back every week, as soon as the government’s bills are paid.  People will complain that they aren’t getting enough money back, so spending will be reigned in.

3)Jobs – Barack Obama wants to create green jobs.  I will create jobs that will not discriminate against color.

4)Global Warming – Obama wants to fight global warming year round.  I will only fight global warming when it is hot.  I would encourage global warming when it gets too cold. 

5)Abortion - Barack Obama believes that life begins at birth.  I believe that it begins at 40.  This gives a woman the leverage needed to make sure her children listen to her. 

A Message for Democrat Party Delegates and Superdelegates

The Primary season concludes tonight.  Whether you are an Obama delegate, a Clinton delegate, an uncommitted delegate, or a John Edwards delegate or a superdelegate for any of the fore mentioned, I have good news for you.  You are not legally bound to your candidate.

Sometime between now and the Democratic convention in August, I want you to think about nominating Ahmnodt Heare as your candidate.  I can unite the party because I am neither Barack Obama nor am I Hillary Clinton.  A vote for me is a vote for somebody who is not an enemy with either campaign.  I am not overly friendly with either candidate either.

It’s been a LONG primary season.  Just relax for a while and think about my proposal.  I think it’s a win-win for all involved.

We Need to Stop the Ignorance

I am about to educate you about Democrats and Republicans and why I am the only candidate (besides Kat Swift) who can bring real change.

Democrats like to make you feel like a victim.  If you are not a victim, then you are an evil Republican and must be stopped.

Republicans like to blame everybody but themselves.  The government debt has almost doubled since Bush took over, but the debt is the Democrats’ fault.  They tend to forget that 1)Republicans had control of both houses for six years and 2)Bush signed all of the Democrats’ spending into law.

If you are a Democrat or a Republican, you need to realize that your poop stinks and that Americans want to breathe fresh air now.  I am that fresh air.

We have been a country of Republicans and Democrats since the Civil War.  We know what both parties are about and it’s not pretty.  We went from Democratic control to Republican control and back over the last 15 years.  We keep changing between the two because we don’t like what the party currently in power is offering.

I won’t offer what the two parties have been giving us.  I have offered a comprehensive energy program.  This Sunday, I will offer an unique solution to our economic dilemma.  Sunday’s show will air at 10PM EDT.

I Demand a Recount!

I don’t think I won the Pennsylvania Democratic Primary last night. But poll numbers were showing that I had 9% of the vote. Even if I didn’t end up with that much, I would at the very least have a couple of percentage points in the voting. It’s another sad day for Pennsylvania Democratic politics.

Pennsylvania Primary Registration Ends Today!

Today is the last day Pennsylvanians can register to vote for next month’s Primaries.  The main point is not whether you register as a Democrat or as a Republican.  The point is on Primary Day, writing in “Ahmnodt Heare” for President.  This holds true for other parties having primaries in Pennsylvania.

TheSpoof.com : Both Clinton and Obama Would Make Ahmnodt Heare Vice President funny satire story

TheSpoof.com : Both Clinton and Obama Would Make Ahmnodt Heare Vice President

I just want to say that I am flattered that both candidates would consider me to be their vice-president. However, I am running for president and I plan to run until at least November. I don’t have a party convention to tell me I don’t have enough votes to continue my campaign, so I will continue.

People are starting to pay attention to my campaign. The more people see, the more they like. Whether people like my ideas or they hate the other ideas spewing around, more Americans are saying, “Ahmnodt Heare!”