Closing Statement
America needs more than change. America needs a few greenbacks also. America needs some with a vision, a sense of leadership, and the ability to think out of a box without being called a “maverick.”
I will give the same fight to the evils of government that I have given to the CineMafia and to Buckles the Clown. I will give the same dedication to my country as I gave to the hottie last Saturday Night.
I will fight people who hold debates and not invite me. I understand John McCain had to be there live because he doesn’t know what a blog is. No more Budweiser for me. Anheiser-Busch sponsors debates but only invites two parties. I would invite all 2,794 candidates to debate.
Tonight I will end by asking you for your vote. A vote for Me is a vote for affordable entertainment, an affordable health care system, and a vote for change. On Election Day, tell your fellow Americans, “Ahmnodt Heare!”
Education Plan
My plan is to abandon our current plan of education and replace it with tools children can really use. While it is nice that I know what an obtuse angle, that information will not get me a job, feed me, or get me hotties. The tools I would use are:
- Teach children how to beat a drug test
- How to talk their way out of a traffic ticket
- How to live on credit cards
Once children learn what they need to learn to advance in life, we will again be the envy of the world.
Could You Appoint a Supreme Court Justice with an Opposing View on Roe. v. Wade?
I can try. I will look for people who think outside the box like I do. I would pick a Justice who will do something about those hideous black robes.
Health Care – Controling Costs or Expanding Service?
I am for cutting costs. I believe in my “Apple a Day” program. It will make expanding services unnecessary because by eating an apple a day, everybody will be healthy and not need health care.
Can We Reduce Our Dependence on Foreign Oil?
President Bush has lead the way in cutting dependence by shooting the economy down the drain. The fewer people with money, the less oil we need. I went into my energy program here.
My Vice President
My original vice-president candidate was E.D. Yot. He was disqualified due to his being born, raised, and living in Canada. I have chosen myself because nobody wanted to be my running mate. To meet Constitutional standards, I have a residence in another state.
Time Out!
My dogs have to pee. I will return as soon as I handle this moment of crisis.
About
Ahmnodt Heare is a fictional character running a real campaign. He is an Independent candidate for President of the United States. His views on solving America’s problems is different than the ideas being offered by any Republican or Democratic candidate.
In the upcoming days, he will give a daily account of his political activities, campaigns, and other behind the scene activities like no other candidate ever has.
The purpose of this blog is to showing the absurdity of Ahmnodt Heare’s platform and show that the two major parties are equally absurd (especially at the federal level.)
If you are fed up with the two-party duopoly, then feel free to write in “Ahmnodt Heare” for the office of your choosing.
On Election Day, tell your fellow Americans, “Ahmnodt Heare!”
Ahmnodt Heare for America. Ahmnodt Heare for You.
Ahmnodt Heare for President 