Ahmnodt Heare for President

Ahmnodt Heare For America… Ahmnodt Heare For You.

Why I’m Running for President

Some people might say I am setting my goals too high, but I’m not one of those people.  I see a Congress that is more than willing to save big business from failing but does nothing for small businesses like the nudie bar down the street from me.  I see a congress that wants America’s youth to volunteer while the only volunteering they have done is volunteer to  give themselves raises.

I see a president who says he wants to help the average America, but has done nothing about the affordability of going to a movie.  Movie prices have increased here recently as well as the price of refreshments.  I see a president who says he wants to fight terrorism, but has done nothing to prevent the likes of William Shattner and Anne Murray from infiltrating our country.

I see a Democratic Party that complained about “trickle-down” economics, but gave trillions to failed businesses with none of that money trickling down.  I see a Republican Party that claims to be fiscally conservative, but voted to fund a “bridge to nowhere” with a GOP Congress and President to a red state with Republican senators and a Republican governor.

This is why I am running for President as an Independent:  Because I get it.  I see that small businesses and families need help as much as big businesses and the Cinemafia.  I see that prosperity cannot exist when money is taken from people trying to prosper to people who have prospered and blew the money.  I see that people want ther bridges want to go from somewhere to somewhere else.

I can’t do this alone.  (Unless I took over via a coup d’ e’tat, which I can’t because government too too much tax money for me to fund that.  Besides, somebody might get hurt.)  I need your help and I will need your vote.  Because somebody has to look out for the average American.


March 26, 2009 - Posted by | Ahmnodt, Bailout, campaign, change, cinemafia, commentary, debt, Democrats, economy, editorial, election, foreign policy, issues, politics, Republicans, satire | , , , , ,


  1. I’d vote for you, but first I have to get my voting rights restored. Being a felon does that to one 😐 .

    I like William Shatner, but I say let’s execute Anne Murray (is she still alive? *sigh* )

    Comment by gryphonscry | March 26, 2009

  2. As popular as that sounds, we can’t just go around executing people if they haven’t killed anybody. I would make Anne Murray sit in the front row of every Jonas Brothers concert so she can get a close-up look at the type of damage she has done.

    Comment by Ahmnodt Heare | March 26, 2009

  3. You know of course that Anne Murray (X33422/1334-TR) and William Shatner (G55343-445/3) are both actually robots which were created by the Diefenbaker government….

    Any attempt to stop them will be futile.

    Comment by Ram Venkatararam | March 26, 2009

  4. If they’re robots, they should be recalled IMMEDIATELY!

    Comment by Ahmnodt Heare | March 26, 2009

  5. So once you’ve sorted out the US, you’ll come back here and sort us out, yes?

    Comment by womaninblack | April 3, 2009

  6. As the leader of the free world, I would straighten out the free world. I would replace G-20 summits with G-string summits.

    Comment by Ahmnodt Heare | April 3, 2009

  7. What is your position on the price of beer? Don’t you think that it is the right of humans to have access to free beer?

    Comment by C. Fraser | April 6, 2009

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