Ahmnodt Heare for President

Ahmnodt Heare For America… Ahmnodt Heare For You.

A Look at my Platform – Drugs

Over the next couple weeks, I will take issues from my platform and further explain my positions. Today, I will discuss my views on drugs.

My “Just say, ‘OK, but Just This Once’.” drug policy satisfies the curiosity people often have with drugs, yet offers an out before they get addicted.

The biggest problem with the “War on Drugs” and the “Just say No” campaign is human nature.  Teenagers want to show that they can make decisions without help.  But when parents tell their children not to do drugs, then the teens will rebel and do drugs.  Teens do not want to be talked to like children.

Teenagers are also curious.  They like to try things out and make their own evaluation.  We can teach abstinence until the cows come home, but the babies will cry nine months from now.

Everybody should try everything once. (Except for scrapple, that stuff is nasty.)  They should have to buy the drugs though.  They should realize the following:

  • Drugs can get you high.
  • The high never lasts long.
  • The crash lasts longer.
  • Getting high isn’t cheap.
  • Ahmnodt Heare is a cool guy.

If your child still wants to get high after the first time, shake him or her violently and remind of the dangers of addiction.  If that doesn’t work, then take your child hunting and shoot him or her before your child becomes a hopeless loser who preys upon his or her family and friends.

May 22, 2009 Posted by | Ahmnodt, commentary, editorial, Platform, satire | , , , , , | 2 Comments

A Look at my Platform – Income Taxes

Over the next couple weeks, I will take issues from my platform and further explain my positions. Today, I will discuss my views on income taxes.

The current tax code is too difficult. My tax code would involve all Americans sending in 100% of their income and giving a refund every Friday once the government bills are paid for the week.

This will accomplish a number of goals:

  • It will make sure all of the government’s bills are paid and we don’t borrow to pay for government.
  • It will curb spending because many people will complain if they’re not getting enough money back.
  • It will assure that people have money for the weekend.

People will get less money back at first because we have to pay off the debt.  The goal is to eventually limit the amout of money government needs to spend to 20% of people’s paycheck.

As for getting paid every Friday, this will be in effect even if you only get paid once every two weeks.  Welfare recipients will recieve their benefits every Friday.  Hush money will be paid every Friday.

This is the most sensible plan because it allows government to pays its bills without running a debt and people will get a sense of how much it costs to run government.  People will also have money for the weekend every weekend.

May 22, 2009 Posted by | Ahmnodt, commentary, economy, editorial, satire, taxes | , , , , | 3 Comments

   

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