Ahmnodt Heare for President

Ahmnodt Heare For America… Ahmnodt Heare For You.

Revised Picks for Cabinet

NOTE: Some are left blank.   Some revisions have been made since my original picks.  Be sure to check this page often as I fill my cabinet.

President: Ahmnodt Heare

Vice-President: Pamela Villars

Secretary of State: David _______

Chief of Staff: Claire Collins

Press Secretary: “Gryphon” Aerie

Secretary of Commerce: Oprah Winfrey

Secretary of the Interior: Martha Stewart

Secretary of Energy: Matthew Lesko

Secretary of Defense: Mike Singletary

Secretary of Health and Human Services: Dr. Jack Kevorkian

Secretary of Education: George W. Bush

Secretary of the Treasury: Dennis Kozlowski

I would also make picks in the following:

Federal Reserve Chair: Bernie Madoff

U.S. Ambassador to the United Nations : Alex Jones

U.S. Ambassador to France: Mike Lansing

NBA Commissioner: Isiah Thomas

Note:  Offices and Prospects in italics were added on February 4, 2010.


September 8, 2009 - Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, commentary, politics, satire | , , , , , , , , , , ,


  1. I need a VP Candidate. This position has been hard to keep filled.

    Comment by Ahmnodt Heare | September 8, 2009

  2. I may be a bit prejudiced on the matter but, let me be Frank with you, I think I would be the ideal person to be elevated from Chief Advisor to VP on the ticket but I do recognize that you may need some greater name recognition.

    For energy and enthusiasm, given that Billy Mays took his Oxyclean cruise to the great beyond, may I suggest Vince Shlomi, possibly you know him as the ShamWow Guy.

    Sure he’s had some legal difficulties recently but, let’s face it, it gives him some street-cred with the youts – and their votes are critically important to any successful campaign since they know all about that interwebs stuff. Plus, all his skeletons are already out of the proverbial closet – at least I think so.

    Comment by David | September 8, 2009

  3. David, as long as you fit the constitutional requirements and can make a pot of coffee, I would be honored to have you for my vice-president.

    As for a spokesperson for my campaign, I am looking for Derek Jeter. While Vince is a good salesperson, Derek Jeter has been selling Ford cars for over two years via commercial during Mets and Red Sox games. If he can sell to his enemies, imagine what he can sell to his friends.

    Comment by Ahmnodt Heare | September 8, 2009

  4. And Derek Jeter is hawt…according to my female friends and the occasional gay. I think so too.

    Comment by David | September 8, 2009

  5. I am THRILLED to be Chief of Staff! What do I get to do?

    Comment by Claire Collins | September 11, 2009

  6. While I love that you’ve chosen my darling sister for Chief of staff. Can I suggest Paula Dean for the FDA?

    Comment by suzettevaughn | September 11, 2009

  7. Claire, The Chief of Staff gets to control the Staff of the White House.

    Comment by Ahmnodt Heare | September 11, 2009

  8. Suzette, I was planning something different for the FDA. I am leaning towards Tommy Chong to head that department. While some may dismiss my pick as someone solely concerned with the “D” part of the FDA, Tommy Chong has been known to get the munchies, which puts the “F” part into play.

    Comment by Ahmnodt Heare | September 11, 2009

  9. This thread has been revised.

    Comment by Ahmnodt Heare | February 4, 2010

  10. […] President of the United States.  I will have that problem remedied by having a highly-qualified cabinet.  I will be in constant communication with my cabinet and they will console me so I can make […]

    Pingback by No Vacation « Ahmnodt Heare for President | April 15, 2010

  11. Impressive list.

    Although you might want to get Justin Beiber in there, or one of the Vagina Virgins (aka. Jonas Brothers) just to secure the four to fourteen year-old demographic.

    Sure, they can’t vote or anything, but never underestimate their powers of persuasion over the parentals.

    Comment by bschooled | April 16, 2010

  12. I will consider the Jonas Brothers. Justin Bieber, unfortunately, is out of the question. https://ahmnodtheare.wordpress.com/2010/02/13/canadas-newest-spy/

    Comment by Ahmnodt Heare | April 16, 2010

  13. […] of them I will be prepared to handle.  Whether I make the decision myself or after consulting my cabinet, I will think things thoroughly before making a […]

    Pingback by The Cinemafia vs. Spam « Ahmnodt Heare for President | September 10, 2010

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