Ahmnodt Heare for President

Ahmnodt Heare For America… Ahmnodt Heare For You.

Northeast Blizzard

There are two reasons why I haven’t been online the last two days:  Shoveling and Blackout  (The blackout lasted for 22 hours, but I spent most of that time sleeping or shoveling.).  It tends to be difficult to keep up with shoveling when it is snowing an inch an hour.  It is harder when you are without the benefits of a snow blower or a plow.

I had spent all morning and afternoon shoveling.  It was getting dark and the one inch per hour turned into 2 inches per hour.  Catching up became futile so I decided I was shoveling for the day.  I went inside and watched some of the gold medal women’s hockey game between the United States and Canada.  Team Canada won 2-0 and I became distraught.

MSNBC announced that after the medals were given out, that they were going to play the Canadian National Anthem.  Not on my TV they weren’t.  I turned the TV off and headed outside to throw snowball at objects so I could vent.   One of the objects I hit was the top of the telephone pole where the electrical wire is connected from the pole to the house.  The electric wire came down and the town became dark.  Fortunately, I was able to scurry back in the house before anybody could see what happened.  (Not that they could see as it was dark and no lights were around.)

I had spent a good portion of yesterday shoveling the snow that had fallen Thursday night and Friday morning.  There was a foot and a half on the ground in addition to the foot of snow I had shoveled on Thursday.  I was soon running out of places to put snow as the snow banks from shoveling were soon over my head.  I thought I was just about done when the town snow plow came and cleared the road, leaving a three-foot bank blocking my driveway.  The bank was not only high, it was also three feet across. It was also dense, icy, and heavy.  it took me FOREVER to get rid of that snowbank!

I will be spending time brainstorming ideas on how better to remove snow.  The way towns do it now is a bad idea, and I will bring that up at the next town meeting.  If the streets are public property, then so is the snow that falls on it.  I do not want public snow on my private property!  I will think of a better way.  This is why I am running for President.  I am always thinking of better ways to run this great country of ours.

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February 27, 2010 - Posted by | commentary, editorial, humor, satire, scandal | , , , , , , , , , , ,

6 Comments

  1. When you move into the White House, they have staff for snow removal so your shoveling days will be over.

    Comment by David | February 27, 2010

  2. I hope so. My one fear is that with the tidbit you just provided, everybody in the North will want to run for President.

    Comment by Ahmnodt Heare | February 27, 2010

  3. Some people actually seem to like snow – it is beyond me to understand why.

    Comment by David | February 27, 2010

  4. Those who like snow are skiers, children, and other people who don’t have to shovel.

    Comment by Ahmnodt Heare | February 27, 2010

  5. My one hope is that after you become President you wait until the sun successfully melts the snow before attacking it with nukes.

    Comment by Contrario | February 27, 2010

  6. My plan is less dangerous than that. I would install heat lamps along the side of roads. I’d aim them on the ground and try to keep the road temperature above freezing.

    Comment by Ahmnodt Heare | February 27, 2010


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