Ahmnodt Heare for President

Ahmnodt Heare For America… Ahmnodt Heare For You.

Heat, Hacking, and Other Recent News

There’s been a lot of news recently.  Not all of it is good, but I have an attack plan.

Heat Wave – The eastern 2/3 of the United States is currently under a dangerous heat wave.  In the past, i would have said now is a good time to fight global warming.  After consulting meteorologists, people who work outdoors, and my psychic, I have determined that the best time to fight global warming is before it gets hot.   Likewise, the best time to encourage global warming is before it gets cold.

Hacking – Ruppert and James Murdoch of NewsCorp faced a parliamentary committee (It’s like a Congressional committee, except it has people with British accents).  Hacking is against my policy as is wiretapping.  Video cameras would only be used on the hottest women.  Nobody wants to see me wolf down a box of Ring Dings.

Migraines – Michele Bachmann has them.  Migraines should not be the reason why you don’t vote for her.  You shouldn’t vote for her because you are voting for me.

Debt Ceiling – I would lower it.  They say we can’t pay the national debt off.  That doesn’t mean wh shouldn’t at least try.   We need to find out why government is spending so much money and start pinching pennies.  It shouldn’t cost $3.4 trillion to run the United States.



July 21, 2011 - Posted by | Ahmnodt, commentary, editorial, humor, issues, satire | , , , , , ,


  1. You should go with the campaign slogan – Migraine Free.

    Comment by Bearman | July 21, 2011

    • I can do that on the days I don’t have migraines!

      Comment by Ahmnodt Heare | July 21, 2011

  2. In order to help the budget, America should live off a diet of macaroni and cheese (off brand, not Kraft).

    Everybody is going to be having the blue box blues. 😦

    Comment by Scholar Mel | July 21, 2011

    • That’s a good idea. I would replace the fancy meals currently served at the White House with mac&cheese and hot dogs. I would also replace the master chefs with cafeteria workers. That would save a few million during my administration.

      Comment by Ahmnodt Heare | July 21, 2011

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