A New Demographic

I am surprised I haven’t thought of this earlier.  While I have reached many of the same demographics other politicians have been trying to reach (mothers, business owners, strippers, etc.) as well as a few that the others have not been campaigning to (children, the deceased, etc.), There has been one increasingly important demographic I have ignored for too long.  I have failed to reach out to zombies.

Zombies are supposedly everywhere.  I have yet to see any, but I hear about them every day.  This hasn’t prevented me from making a campaign poster for zombies:

I am making the assumption that they will be able to read the link to this website that the printer was written in a special invisible ink that only zombies can read.  He also said that the extra $200 for 10 posters was a steal.

I have found a few places to hang the posters.  There are posters currently hanging across the street from the local newspaper publishing plant, the headquarters of the Justine Bateman fan club, and other dying places.  These places will soon be dead and attract zombies.

I will give a shout-out to zombies in a future podcast.  (Though probably not this week’s show due to the time needed to express my manifesto.)