Ahmnodt Heare for President

Ahmnodt Heare For America… Ahmnodt Heare For You.

Sports Programming Retards

Before you say anything, I am going to tell you how I define “retard” so my e-mail isn’t filled with hate mail.  I do not mean people who are mentally challenged.  They should not be made fun of.  I mean people who can think, but opt not to.  Those people should be made fun of, insulted, whatever it takes to get them to THINK!

The object of promoting sports is to promote the sport.  It sounds simple, but it goes over so many heads in the sports programming world.  This means putting the best games on TV and scheduling sports doubleheaders so that the second game can be seen in its entirely after the first game.

Saturday:  SNY (Sportsnet New York) had a college basketball doubleheader on their network.  The first game was Northern Colorado at Marquette at 4:00PM.  The second game was South Carolina State at Pittsburgh.  These are hardly marquee games (games this time of year are usually top-tier teams playing against weaker teams to fatten the win-loss records of the stronger team.  This is a time honored tradition.

At 6:00, Marquette was leading Northern Colorado 80-60 with five minutes remaining.  (Marquette would win 93-52.)  Instead of relieving viewers of five minutes of bad basketball, they should have switched to the South Carolina State-Pittsburgh game.  SNY ended up showing Northern Colorado fouling Marquette players so they could limit them to two point plays and try to overcome a 20-point deficit by shooting a bunch of three-point baskets.  Fouls stop the clock.  I could rant at Northern Colorado for thinking they could come back, but when one plays a game, one is never supposed to give up.)

By the time the Northern Colorado-Marquette game ended, the South Carolina State-Pittsburgh game was already halfway through the first half in a tight (at the time) game.  Pittsburgh ended up winning by a sizable margin, but they didn’t get it going until the second half.

My beef on Sunday was with CBS.  The last seven games of the season are subject to having one of the Sunday afternoon games switched to Sunday evening before a national audience on NBC.  The game NBC ended up showing last night was Baltimore at San Diego.  Rumor had it that NBC and the NFL wanted to show the New England at Denver game in that slot, but CBS and Patriots’ owner Robert Kraft nixed the deal.  I don’t know why Kraft was against it, but CBS was against it because it would have been the highest rated game with the most viewers.  The only problem is that the Patriots-Broncos game was not shown in New York City (CBS’s largest local market.)  People in New York were subject to watching the Jets get slaughtered by the Eagles.

Here is how to promote sports:

College basketball – Have a doubleheader, but schedule the games 2 1/2 hours apart.  The time between games can have a studio team who can split the time between games dissecting the previous game and previewing the upcoming game.

NFL Football – Change the late afternoon games to 4:30PM Eastern.  If there is a marquee game and a local game scheduled at the same time, sell the broadcasting rights of the local game to a television station in the local area.  There will still be a market for NFL Sunday ticket for Washington Redskins fans like me who don’t live in the market and know the Redskins aren’t going to be the marquee game very often, but still want to watch their game.

Schedule better, don’t be afraid to break away from a bad game to show another game in its entirety, and show viewers that you really want viewers.  This is my advice for the sports programming retards.


December 19, 2011 - Posted by | Ahmnodt, commentary, editorial, humor, satire | , , , , , , , , , , ,


  1. I can’t believe they didn’t show the Patriots/Broncos game for you. I’m glad they didn’t change the game for Sunday night because that means it would have came on at 3 in the morning for me.

    I was up till 2 to finish the game watching on the internet.

    I also hate how stations always show the local teams even if it is a bad game over a better game.

    Where I grew up we were always showed either the Cowboys or the Chiefs. Ugg…

    Comment by Scholar Mel | December 20, 2011

    • I live in the NYC market. At least the Jets and Giants win enough games to have games shown on prime time and we sometimes get an out-of-market game on Sunday. We get the Chargers – Lions game as the late game Sunday because the Jets and Giants play each other in the early game Sunday leaving a late game opening.

      Comment by Ahmnodt Heare | December 20, 2011

  2. If I cared or even liked organized sports there would be a semi-cogent comment here. Was compelled to read your post based strictly on your use of the word retard in the title.
    Good argument just the same, Especially “Schedule better, don’t be afraid to break away from a bad game to show another game in its entirety, and show viewers that you really want viewers. This is my advice for the sports programming retards.”

    ~Some Retard Who Who Was Always Picked Last For Sports In School and Will Not Let That Resentment Go. Ever.

    Comment by Rachael Black | December 20, 2011

    • I was also picked last often (sometimes I wasn’t picked at all.) My motto is: “Let them win their ball game. I will win in life.” (or something.)

      Comment by Ahmnodt Heare | December 20, 2011

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