Ahmnodt Heare for President

Ahmnodt Heare For America… Ahmnodt Heare For You.

2011 – A Look Back (Goals)

I had high hopes for 2011.  Not only did I not reach any of the goals I had set for the campaign, I did not get high.  Below are the goals I had set for 2011:2011 – 151475 total hits (415.00 hits/day) [projected]

Below are my goals I had set for the campaign for 2011.

  1. Averaging 500 unique hits per day on this website.
  2. 1,000,000  results when people search for “Ahmnodt Heare” on Google.  (we are currently at 17,600)
  3. Enough write-in votes in upcoming 2012 primaries (Democratic and Republican).
  4. At least 1,000 blogs mentioning Ahmnodt Heare and the campaign.
  5. An “Ahmnodt Girl” video.
  6. At least five national television appearances (broadcast or cable).
  7. One scandal involving a multitude of women.  (More people are talking about Tiger Woods now than ever before!)
Not only did the number of hits get nowhere 500 a day, they went down for 2011.  I blame this on the CineMafia and America’s hidden love affair for all things Atlanta Falcons.  While I am nowhere near a million results when searching on Google, I am approaching 30,000 when the safe filter is off.  (The number dwindles to 47 when using the safe filter.)  My worst target was hoping 1,000 blogs would write something about my campaign.  It turns out that only 10 blogs mentioned me (9 of which were in the comments section after I had left a comment.)
I am optimistic that 2012 will be the year that someone steps up and does the “Ahmnodt Girl” video.  While I didn’t have an actual appearance, my tweets did.  (One on MSNBC and two on local TV.)  I couldn’t get myself in a scandal no matter how hard I tried.  My scandal plans failed, everything from sending tweets of myself to writing racist newsletters fell upon deaf eyes and ears.  Even the “running into the ladies’ locker room naked” at the gym backfired as there were no women in there when I did it.
My resolution for 2012 is simple:  Learn from my mistakes.  I will learn from my mistakes as soon as I learn what the mistakes I made were.
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December 26, 2011 - Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, commentary, humor, politics, satire | , , , , , , ,

4 Comments

  1. I was hoping to be pronounced emperor of the blogosphere by now, but no such luck.

    Comment by Elliot | December 26, 2011

    • You would have been a better emperor of the blogosphere than the doofus from Nebraska who ended up with the title.

      Comment by Ahmnodt Heare | December 27, 2011

  2. “At least 1,000 blogs mentioning Ahmnodt Heare and the campaign.”

    Do you have any serious how to’s? You could be a guest poster on Dummies of the Year!

    I would be one blog down. You should start guest posting to reach your goal of 1000. 🙂

    Comment by Scholar Mel | December 27, 2011

    • I have some recipes for a skillet, that’s all I have.

      Comment by Ahmnodt Heare | December 27, 2011


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