A Good Sex Scandal is Hard to Come By
One would have figured with the frequency I attend nudie bars that I would have been caught up in a sex scandal by now. Or that a lonely housewife would have been attracted by my presidential appeal and would want to get involved in a little something-something while her husband was at work.
Albee Thayer suggested I hire a prostitute. There are a couple problems with that approach. The first problem is that it’s illegal in every state except Nevada. The other problem is that I only want the sex so I can get caught in a scandal that would give my campaign publicity, it would mean that i would be spending money on my campaign. I refuse to spend money on my campaign.
I don’t want to make it look like I am trolling for women for sex. (Even though I am.) I tried asking for booty pics until my campaign manager advised against it, citing that I look more like a dirty old man than a presidential candidate. I was going to send pictures of myself, but we all know what happened when former Congressman Anthony Weiner sent his pics to women.
I won’t be campaigning during the week this week. I will be spending this weekend in Delaware and next weekend in Rhode Island as I resume my “Three Electoral State Blitz” and try to win the election with winning the three and four electoral states, New Jersey, and New York.
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About
Ahmnodt Heare is a fictional character running a real campaign. He is an Independent candidate for President of the United States. His views on solving America’s problems is different than the ideas being offered by any Republican or Democratic candidate.
In the upcoming days, he will give a daily account of his political activities, campaigns, and other behind the scene activities like no other candidate ever has.
The purpose of this blog is to showing the absurdity of Ahmnodt Heare’s platform and show that the two major parties are equally absurd (especially at the federal level.)
If you are fed up with the two-party duopoly, then feel free to write in “Ahmnodt Heare” for the office of your choosing.
On Election Day, tell your fellow Americans, “Ahmnodt Heare!”
Ahmnodt Heare for America. Ahmnodt Heare for You.
Ahmnodt Heare for President 
You could always just make something up. The media tends to report stuff whether it’s true or not.
The media wants more than my word. They want witnesses and pictures. (The racier the better.)
But women’s rights advocates believe the gender breakdown of the current candidates’ campaign staffs might reflect their overall attitude towards women . They cited the allegations of sexual harassment being leveled at Herman Cain, who also recently made a sexist comment about House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi in a national debate .