Ahmnodt Heare for President

Ahmnodt Heare For America… Ahmnodt Heare For You.

Accessing the Damage

The 2012 election was a disaster.  Not just because Barack Obama won (it would have been a disaster if Mitt Romney, Gary Johnson, Jill Stein, Roseanne Barr, or Vermin Supreme won), it was a disaster because I did not win.  I received fewer votes than in 2008.  I couldn’t even win Saguache County, Colorado this time.

Much of my campaigning in the last month was hampered by my computer crapping out and by Hurricane Sandy.  And while the women at the nudie bar like me as a patron, I could not parlay that into them campaigning for me or for them getting out to vote.

The “Voter ID” laws also caused damage to my voting base.  Deceased people and zombies tend not to carry identification on their persons because they generally don’t need identification.Neither demographic drives so they don’t need to get a drivers’ licence.

My campaign’s exposure to the mainstream was also sorely lacking.  I received no television coverage other than the occasional apolitical tweet read on television.

My goal is to run another penniless campaign in 2016.  But if I can’t get any television exposure or trend on Twitter, then I will spend some money on the campaign.  There might even be a PayPal account for donations.  (I hate asking for money.)

There will be goals set soon and I will post them once I figure out how I am going to win in 2016.


November 7, 2012 - Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, commentary, humor, media, Obama, Romney, satire | , , , , , , , , , , ,


  1. Take a year off and recollect yourself. Then you’ll be ready to jump back in.

    Comment by Bearman Cartoons | November 7, 2012

    • I am taking a week or two off. I need to be fully established by 2014 if I am going to compete with the Democratic and Republican contenders as by then, they will get the bulk of the media coverage.

      Comment by Ahmnodt Heare | November 7, 2012

  2. There was a drunk woman in the bar, crying and puking because Romney didn’t win. You need that level of commitment from your supporters.

    Comment by yellowcat | November 8, 2012

    • I puked when I found out I didn’t win. I puked again when I checked the official results and wasn’t even in the top ten in votes. Most of my supporters were busy with the semi-annual “Orgies for Abstinence” bringing abstinence awareness throughout the country.

      Comment by Ahmnodt Heare | November 9, 2012

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