Ahmnodt Heare for President

Ahmnodt Heare For America… Ahmnodt Heare For You.

Government Shutdown

The way President Obama is handling the “government shutdown” is but another example of why I would have been a better president than him.  Below are some reasons why:

  • Only “Non-essential” services are shut down.  The question isn’t what is essential but who decides what is essential.  I would have shut down the IRS, but not because everybody hates it.  I would shut it down to send a message to Congress that neither they nor I will get paid as long as there is a shutdown because there is no revenue being collected.
  • I’d keep the national parks open because people need to get out more.  By  the time this shutdown is over, it will be too cold to enjoy the parks.
  • The NSA is working as normal.  Nobody at the NSA really likes me (except the guy in the corner cubicle who always like to start a ruckus.)
  • I’d not only close the Bureau of Wild Horse and Burro closed during the shutdown, I’d close it permanently.  I hope the five people who own a wild horse or a burro understand that the 300,000,000 Americans who don’t own one feel that a federal agency isn’t really necessary.

If you cannot afford a prostate exam, the TSA will perform one for you at no additional charge if you plan on flying on an airplane.

UPDATE: The move has been delayed by a week.  The official activity will return on Columbus Day.  (Thanksgiving Day in Canada)

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October 1, 2013 - Posted by | Ahmnodt, humor, politics, satire | , , , , , , , ,

2 Comments

  1. I hear people all the time say, “I could do a better job than the current President.” [No matter who that President happens to be at the time.] If I found myself suddenly President, I would shit my pants in terror. I suspect most people would do likewise. But you may be different, for all I know.

    Comment by modestypress | October 3, 2013

  2. I would hope that I am different. This is what I am banking on as I run for President. Being President is a hard job, but it has to be done. How many more Presidents can competently hold office until we see just how bad our public school system has been?

    Comment by Ahmnodt Heare | October 17, 2013


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