Ahmnodt Heare for President

Ahmnodt Heare For America… Ahmnodt Heare For You.

Busy Busy Busy

It’s odd that I would find myself busier during vacation than I am usually during the year.  It started early yesterday morning when I went to a local doctor to get a walking boot for the cast on my ankle.  I no longer have to use crutches, but I am still getting around slower than I would like.  I am currently looking for an inline skate I can use on the boot.

I went to the local restaurant for breakfast.  Word got around town that I am here for vacation.  In most parts of the country, I could get around relatively anonyomusly.  In Saguache County, I am as popular as rock star Ajay Bhatt.  The owner of the restaurant showed me the new lunch and dinner menus they have been using the last week.  On the lower left hand corner of the menu is Grandma Oudda’s recipes.

After breakfast, a couple of locals took me on a tour of Saguache County.  The first stop was the town of Center.  The middle of town was a movie theather that closed last year when the citizens of Center decided to fight the Cinemafia by boycotting the theater.  The touching moment came when I found out that people were in the process of buying the theather and making it into the Ahmnodt Heare Community Center.

We were soon off to Crestone.  One of the things you notice immediately about Crestone is that many religions have house of worship here.  There are almost as many religions here as residents of Crestone.  We made a quick stop to Moffat.  there isn’t much to Moffat now, but the town almost became the state capital of Colorado.  (It lost a close election to Denver.)

The final stop was a small ghost-town like village of Bonanza.  Fourteen people live here, but I didn’t get to meet any of them.  The people I was with told me I was probably better off not meeting them because most of them voted for McCain.  I told them that that didn’t matter to me and that I forgive them for their error in judgement.

We headed back to Saguache.  I was having a hard time breathing.  I don’t know if it was because of the elevation (most of the county is over 14,000 feet above sea level) or if it was from the smoke in the air.  I understand that the smoke came from the Los Angeles area, but not because Manny Ramirez is hot.

The day ended with dinner at the restaurant.  I got to try their Strawberry Stroganoff.  It was very good.  It was the first time I had Strawberry Stroganoff  that wasn’t made by a member of my family.


September 3, 2009 Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, humor, satire | , , , , , , , | Comments Off on Busy Busy Busy

The Trek Home

I have decided that enlightenment is not for me.  My brief time here saw many celebrities die.  Ed McMahon, Farrah Fawcett, Michael Jackson, and Billy Mays all passed away in the week I was at the ashram.

I wanted to leave but the armed guards wouldn’t let me.   The only way out was by escape.  I volunteered to take out the garbage after dinner.  I did my impersonation of a father going out for ice cream and didn’t return.

The sun was setting in the western sky.  I am sure it was a beautiful sunset, but I didn’t know because I walked east.  I kept walking until I saw a motel.  It was a old building on the outside bordering on blight.  The inside was kept in good condition.  The motel is in a small town called “Bonanza.”  I would spend last night in Like the ashram, it was in the middle of nowhere.

I will soon head to Medford by bus.  From Medford,I will be taking a bus to Portland.  I will spend tonight in Portland and fly home tomorrow.

June 29, 2009 Posted by | Ahmnodt, satire | , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments


%d bloggers like this: