Ahmnodt Heare for President

Ahmnodt Heare For America… Ahmnodt Heare For You.

Happy Thanksgiving! (Happy Columbus Day in Canada)

Ahmnodt Heare for President

It was Thanksgiving of 1989.  A few things stood out about that Thanksgiving.  The first thing was the turkey we were supposed to have went bad.  The fowl was foul.  My mother sent me to the supermarket to get a turkey that wasn’t sour.

I had just gotten my license a few weeks earlier.  It was a good thing I had it because none of the supermarkets in the area had any turkeys left over.  It took me a while and a bit of driving to find a supermarket that still had turkeys twenty miles from my home.   The supermarket lines were crowded and it seemed to take forever to pay for the turkey.

I was heading home when the rear passenger tire went flat.  I had never changed a tire before and I soon realized that it would be a while longer before I would change a flat…

View original post 233 more words

November 21, 2012 Posted by | Ahmnodt, humor, Personal Life, satire | , , , , , | Comments Off on

My Favorite Thanksgiving (Repost)

This is a repost from November 25, 2010.

It was Thanksgiving of 1989.  A few things stood out about that Thanksgiving.  The first thing was the turkey we were supposed to have went bad.  The fowl was foul.  My mother sent me to the supermarket to get a turkey that wasn’t sour.

I had just gotten my license a few weeks earlier.  It was a good thing I had it because none of the supermarkets in the area had any turkeys left over.  It took me a while and a bit of driving to find a supermarket that still had turkeys twenty miles from my home.   The supermarket lines were crowded and it seemed to take forever to pay for the turkey.

I was heading home when the rear passenger tire went flat.  I had never changed a tire before and I soon realized that it would be a while longer before I would change a flat.  The car did not have a jack.  I frantically tried to wave somebody down who could help me.  A few people came over and wanted to help, but none of them had jacks either.  A policeman came over just before noon and was able to quickly change the tire.

Thanksgiving started to get good at noon as I was listening to the radio and was introduced to “Alice”s Restaurant” by Arlo Guthrie.  The song is about twelve minutes long and is about two guys who had a worse Thanksgiving than I was having because they were in jail.

I soon arrived home to two very angry parents.  It took them a while for them to realize I wasn’t joyriding trying to avoid Thanksgiving.  Having turkey that day was out of the question because by the time the turkey was prepped and cooked, it would be after 8:00PM before we would eat.  We ended up having pancakes, eggs, bacon, and oatmeal.

There is something to be said for having breakfast as your Thanksgiving meal.  It’s amazing how much relieved people could be of stress once the tradition of a holiday is shot to Hell.  It isn’t the turkey or the football or the “Monk” marathons that make Thanksgiving.  It’s the people you are thankful for having in your life being in your life.

Happy Thanksgiving from the entire Ahmnodt Heare for President campaign team!

November 24, 2011 Posted by | Ahmnodt, humor, Personal Life, satire | , , , , , , | 2 Comments

My Favorite Thanksgiving

It was Thanksgiving of 1989.  A few things stood out about that Thanksgiving.  The first thing was the turkey we were supposed to have went bad.  The fowl was foul.  My mother sent me to the supermarket to get a turkey that wasn’t sour.

I had just gotten my license a few weeks earlier.  It was a good thing I had it because none of the supermarkets in the area had any turkeys left over.  It took me a while and a bit of driving to find a supermarket that still had turkeys twenty miles from my home.   The supermarket lines were crowded and it seemed to take forever to pay for the turkey.

I was heading home when the rear passenger tire went flat.  I had never changed a tire before and I soon realized that it would be a while longer before I would change a flat.  The car did not have a jack.  I frantically tried to wave somebody down who could help me.  A few people came over and wanted to help, but none of them had jacks either.  A policeman came over just before noon and was able to quickly change the tire.

Thanksgiving started to get good at noon as I was listening to the radio and was introduced to “Alice”s Restaurant” by Arlo Guthrie.  The song is about twelve minutes long and is about two guys who had a worse Thanksgiving than I was having because they were in jail.

I soon arrived home to two very angry parents.  It took them a while for them to realize I wasn’t joyriding trying to avoid Thanksgiving.  Having turkey that day was out of the question because by the time the turkey was prepped and cooked, it would be after 8:00PM before we would eat.  We ended up having pancakes, eggs, bacon, and oatmeal.

There is something to be said for having breakfast as your Thanksgiving meal.  It’s amazing how much relieved people could be of stress once the tradition of a holiday is shot to Hell.  It isn’t the turkey or the football or the “Monk” marathons that make Thanksgiving.  It’s the people you are thankful for having in your life being in your life.

Happy Thanksgiving from the entire Ahmnodt Heare for President campaign team!

November 25, 2010 Posted by | Ahmnodt, humor, satire | , , , , , , | Comments Off on My Favorite Thanksgiving

Presidential Diet

I discussed my exercise regiment in yesterday’s blog.  The other part of my weight loss plan is my diet.  A balanced diet and exercise program is needed for proper weight control.  Below is the diet I had as well as the diet plan I am currently on:

BREAKFAST:

Before: A bowl of Froot Loops, one fried egg, two slices toast, small glass orange juice, cup of coffee

After: A bowl of Froot Loops, two scrambled eggs, four slices toast, large glass orange juice, cup of coffee.

Breakfast is the most important meal of the day.  Eating a bigger breakfast will keep you less hungry and give you more energy for the rest of the day.

LUNCH:

Before:  Ham sandwich, potato salad, tall glass of milk

After:  Bologna sandwich, potato chips, tall glass of milk

I replaced ham with bologna because bologna is sliced thinner and has fewer calories.  Replacing potato salad with potato chips will cut the calories from mayonnaise from the potato salad. (Unless you like mayo on your potato chips.)

DINNER:

Before:  4 oz. meat, baked potato, broccoli, salad with ranch dressing, milk.

After: 4 oz chicken, mashed potatoes, string beans, salad with chicken gravy, milk

Chicken has the protein meat has with less fat and with fewer calories.  Mashed potatoes is not as dense as a baked potato and therefore contains fewer calories.  A string bean weighs less than a flower of broccoli.  chicken gravy has more protein than ranch dressing.

SNACK:

Before: Peanuts

After: Shelled Peanuts

Shelled peanuts will help you cut calories because of the time it takes to get the peanuts out of the shell.  The effort required to open the shells also burns calories.

RELAXATION:

Before: Six-pack beer

After:  Six-pack light beer, small bag of popcorn

Light beer has a lot fewer calories than regular beer.  You’ll save enough calories from switching to light beer to enjoy a small bag of popcorn and still consume fewer calories.  The popcorn will help with the drinking of the light beer.

The steps I have taken in diet and exercise will help me lose weight and look more presidential as I hit the campaign trail.


August 5, 2010 Posted by | Ahmnodt, commentary, humor, satire | , , , , , , , , | 9 Comments

Mother’s Day

Today is Mother’s Day.  I will soon be taking my mother out for breakfast.  I used to take her out to lunch, but the Nationals are playing the Marlins today and my father and I will be going to the game.

My mother tried to keep me away from politics; and for the longest time, she was successful.  There were few politicians I like, and by the time I got to vote for them in the general election, those candidates were no longer on the ballot.  Alan Keyes is one such candidate.  He makes me think when he gives speeches and he has charisma.

There are times when I felt I should have listened to my mother, like in 2008.  I was disappointed that I did not receive any electoral votes.  It was further saddening that my own mother voted for somebody else.  (She voted for Barack Obama.)

My mother has since had a change of heart and has told me she will vote for me in 2012.  my mother and I don’t agree on everything politically.  She thinks my stance on abortion is too harsh.  My mother will also go to a movie once in a while, ofter dragging my father with her.

I am thankful that I have my mother’s support for the 2012 election.  Hopefully, she will continue her streak for voting for the winning candidate.  She said she will try to be on my radio show tonight and say “Hello” to the listeners.

I love you, Mom!

May 9, 2010 Posted by | Ahmnodt, commentary, editorial, election, humor, Obama, politics, satire | , , , , | 2 Comments

Breakfast Pot Pie

I think it is about time there is a pot pie for breakfast.  It is too early for turkey or chicken, but the right time for breakfast sausage.

Ingredients:

1 pie crust

8 – 10 strips of cooked bacon

6  eggs

2 cups sausage gravy

In a 9″ x 2″ round pie plate, place the bottom layer of pie crust.  Add a layer of sausage gravy.  In a seperate frying pan, scramble the six eggs and cook until slightly loose.  Place eggs in the pie plate.  Layer the bacon on top of the eggs.  Pour the rest of the sausage gravy on the sausage.  Place the top pie crust layer on top.

Bake at 350° for 30 minutes until crust is brown.  Allow five minutes for cooling.  Serves 6-8.

Other recipes:

Sausage Parfait

Strawberry Stroganoff

Limburger Cheesecake

January 17, 2009 Posted by | Ahmnodt, satire, Uncategorized | , , , , , | 8 Comments

Sausage Parfait

Unlike the Strawberry Stroganoff recipe I posted recently, this recipe is something I conjured up one day.  The secret to my sausage parfait is the sausage.  I use breakfast sausage links and I marinate them in maple syrup prior to cooking.

2 cups cooked sausage links – shredded
4 cups milk, divided use
2/3 cup granulated sugar
3/4 teaspoon salt
2 large eggs
1 tablespoon maple syrup
1 cup blueberries
1 cup frozen whipped topping, thawed

1. Place frozen links in shallow baking pan. Bake at 325oF for 18 to 20 minutes or until meat is no longer pink inside.  Place cooked sausage in blender and set to puree for 2 minutes.
2. Combine shredded sausage, 3 1/2 cups milk, sugar and salt in 2-quart saucepan.
3. Cook over medium-high heat, stirring frequently, until thick and creamy, 15 to 20 minutes.
4. Beat eggs and remaining 1/2 cup milk together. Stir into sausage mixture. Cook 2 minutes longer, stirring constantly. Add maple syrup. Cool.
5. Combine blueberries and whipped topping.
6. Using 1 cup parfait glasses*, alternate sausage pudding and blueberry mixture.

Makes 6 servings.

Be sure to check out the Breakfast Pot Pie and the Limburger Cheesecake!

January 13, 2009 Posted by | Ahmnodt, satire, Uncategorized | , , , , | 5 Comments

   

%d bloggers like this: