Ahmnodt Heare for President

Ahmnodt Heare For America… Ahmnodt Heare For You.

Quasi-Hiatus

My schedule has become a lot tighter than I thought it would be.  My business clients all want more elaborate projects as their businesses grow.  I am making more campaign speeches.  I will be giving a speech at the Kickball Hall of Fame dinner tonight in Dover, DE.  I still have my daughter staying with me for another week and a half and I can’t find a camp or anything to bring her to during the day so she is whining about nothing to do while I am working.

My posts will be limited for the rest of this month.  In addition to what I stated above, I will be going away to attend a wedding in two weeks.  There will be no posts from July 25 to 29.  Albee Thayer told me he will be mountain climbing in Florida that week and will be unable to post during my absence.

I will try to take to social media and doing a video podcast this Sunday evening.  If you would like to watch it, leave a time that is best for you to view it, and I will set it up at a time convenient for the most people.  If it’s late, I’ll probably be doing the show in my “Hello Kitty” pajamas.

Advertisements

July 13, 2012 Posted by | Ahmnodt, Albee, campaign, humor, Personal Life, satire | , , , , , , , , | Comments Off on Quasi-Hiatus

Thwarted Plans

Next weekend was supposed to be my weekend to have my daughter.  But since next Saturday is Vanna White’s birthday, I could not do that.  After much discussion, it was agreed that I will have custody this weekend.  I will also have to pick her up next Sunday for the mid-winter recess.  This is not where the plans are thwarted.

My father has tickets for CPAC this weekend and Patricia and I will be with my father at CPAC.  I was hoping to be campaigning for their straw poll that will be taken towards the end of the conference.  (Here is the thwart) – voting this year will be done electronically with no provisions for write-ins.  The only way I will be able to win the straw poll is if I change my name to Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich, or Rick Santorum.  (Ron Paul was not invited this year because CPAC wants somebody else to win the straw poll, even if he can’t beat Obama or me in a real election.)

I am leaving for Washington tonight.  I am thinking of moving back to the DC area.  (Too many New York Giants, Rangers, and Mets fans here in New Jersey.)  I will be looking for prices for a small two-bedroom condo to own or rent) and a small office to lease.  Below is my new business card:

Just to make it clear, the entire picture is the business card and not just what is being typed.  I had it made by Vista Print.  I am using my campaign phone number as my business phone for now because I don’t have a regular business phone and couldn’t decide between using my cell phone or my home phone as a business phone.  I also didn’t want to get another phone just for the business because I hate phones.

Off to CPAC I Go!  If you watch on C-SPAN on either Saturday or Sunday and you hear somebody yawn, it is probably me.

February 9, 2012 Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, humor, Personal Life, politics, satire, Washington | , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

Brief Poll

Today has been a busy day at the office as I met a client who has had a total of four days experience with the internet and had never had an e-mail account.  I spent the day teaching him the finer points of the internet like e-mail, social networking, and surfing the web for improtant stuff like news, business, and porn.

Tonight at 9:ooPM Eastern is a debate on NBC.  I will once again be taking to Twitter and Facebook giving how I would respond to the questions as well as giving my cutting-edge commentary on the other candidates.  I have been criticized by some people for not being hard on Ron Paul on debates.  This is mostly because he isn’t asked as many questions as the other candidates.

I want to do something different and I would appreciate your input.  My campaign is all about anyway.  The “State of the Union” address is tomorrow night.  There is a debate on Thursday night.  I want to comment live on AhmnodtTV for either the State of the Union tomorrow or the debate on Thursday.

 

January 23, 2012 Posted by | Ahmnodt, debate, Obama, politics, Poll, Social Networking, State of the Union | , , , , , | 5 Comments

Getting America Back to Work

Let’s face it:  Wall Street may be doing well, but Main Street isn’t.  Americans have always been about Main Street.  Though nobody in the government will admit it, they’d rather you work for a big corporation than start your own business.  It means the nation becomes too reliant on big government and big business.  When they fail, everybody loses.

I am all about smaller government.  I am also a believer in small businesses.  If your small business fails, you will be the only loser.  If you govern yourself and you fail, you are the only loser.  But if you work for a multinational business or a multinational government and it fails, everybody fails.

I will give more details tonight on my podcast.  You can hear it live at 11:00PM Eastern/8:00 Pacific or any time after the show ends in the archives.

March 25, 2011 Posted by | Ahmnodt, blogtalk radio, commentary, economy, humor, Platform, satire | , , | 8 Comments

Tea Party Poll and the State of my Business

I can afford  to bring only one type of tea to the tea party.  My business is almost at a standstill as businesses don’t want to spend money for marketing campaigns.  A few of my former clients have lost their businesses.  Another client dropped my services while he still has his business.

My marketing mistakes have largely been limited to my campaign, but I did make a mistake in 2007 with the infamous “Shlomo the Pig” mascot for a kosher restaurant.  I learned then that I have to know my clients.  I now know what the word “schmuck” means.

I have also have had successes, which has allowed me to stay in business.  Due to client confidentiality, I can’t go into detail of the successes, but I can tell you a campaign I am contemplating for Depends Undergarments even though Kimberly-Clark has not asked me to work on any marketing campaign.

Imagine four women out on a patio drinking iced tea and listening to the Oldies station.  The woman who is hosting the tea party has to go to the bathroom.  As she is scurrying to the bathroom, the DJ says that he is calling a random caller for a $1,000 prize.  As the woman walks in the hallway towards the bathroom, the phone rings.  She wants to answer the phone, but the urge to pee is too strong and she runs to the bathroom.  You then hear the DJ say “Looks like no caller this time.  We’ll try somebody else tomorrow.”

The ad slogan: “Depends Undergarments: Your Answering Machine When Mother Nature Calls.”

I think it’s a winning campaign.  I’d buy a pair of Depends just for “Penny ‘Till You Pee” Nights.

April 2, 2009 Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, issues, satire | , , , , , | Comments Off on Tea Party Poll and the State of my Business

Why I’m Running for President

Some people might say I am setting my goals too high, but I’m not one of those people.  I see a Congress that is more than willing to save big business from failing but does nothing for small businesses like the nudie bar down the street from me.  I see a congress that wants America’s youth to volunteer while the only volunteering they have done is volunteer to  give themselves raises.

I see a president who says he wants to help the average America, but has done nothing about the affordability of going to a movie.  Movie prices have increased here recently as well as the price of refreshments.  I see a president who says he wants to fight terrorism, but has done nothing to prevent the likes of William Shattner and Anne Murray from infiltrating our country.

I see a Democratic Party that complained about “trickle-down” economics, but gave trillions to failed businesses with none of that money trickling down.  I see a Republican Party that claims to be fiscally conservative, but voted to fund a “bridge to nowhere” with a GOP Congress and President to a red state with Republican senators and a Republican governor.

This is why I am running for President as an Independent:  Because I get it.  I see that small businesses and families need help as much as big businesses and the Cinemafia.  I see that prosperity cannot exist when money is taken from people trying to prosper to people who have prospered and blew the money.  I see that people want ther bridges want to go from somewhere to somewhere else.

I can’t do this alone.  (Unless I took over via a coup d’ e’tat, which I can’t because government too too much tax money for me to fund that.  Besides, somebody might get hurt.)  I need your help and I will need your vote.  Because somebody has to look out for the average American.

March 26, 2009 Posted by | Ahmnodt, Bailout, campaign, change, cinemafia, commentary, debt, Democrats, economy, editorial, election, foreign policy, issues, politics, Republicans, satire | , , , , , | 7 Comments

My Work Life

I don’t campaign 24 hours a day and 7 days a week.  Like you, I have interests like reading. biking, and nudie bars.  To pay for my campaigns and for my interests, I work.  Today, I launched my latest endeavor.

The perfect balance would be that I get enough work to pay for what I want to do and for my campaign.  But I don’t want so much work that I don’t have time to run for president.  Business was slow today and probably will be tomorrow.

Here is an example of my marketing ability.  945 people have read it since I posted the article two months ago.

February 5, 2009 Posted by | Ahmnodt, economy | , , , | Comments Off on My Work Life

%d bloggers like this: