Back on the Campaign Trail!

Now that the holidays are down and I have caught up with work, I will resume campaigning this weekend.  I will be on the campaign tree all week as I have no work-related meetings and I can do the work I do have on the road.  Below is part of my campaign schedule:

Saturday 1/15 – Arden Hill Hospital, Goshen, NY:  I will be in front of the hospital discussing my health care plan.

Sunday 1/16 – Marist College, Poughkeepsie, NY:  I will have an open forum about education.

Monday 1/17 –  Somewhere along NY Route 17K, Newburgh, NY:  discussing race relations.

Tuesday 1/18 (9:00PM) – Radio show (subject to be determined) live on location from New Paltz, NY.

 

The rest of the schedule will be added soon and this post will be updated soon.

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Adopt-a-Presidential-Candidate

The recession is hitting me as hard as it is hitting most Americans.  Companies that I have done business with for years are folding and other companies are scaling back on their marketing budgets just to survive.  I will make less money in 2010 than I did in 2009.  Despite this, I still need to travel around the world and campaign for leader of the free world.

I can still afford travel.  What is becoming expensive is lodging.  I have already cut lodging expenses from staying in upscale hotels for a week a time to staying at motels on the highway for one or two days.  This will soon me beyond my reach financially.

Instead of asking for money like other people would, I am asking for a place to stay.  My 2011 schedule isn’t set yet, so if you have time available for me to stay over, I can return the favor by cooking breakfast and some light housecleaning.  I am also available for speeches, rallies, and bar and bat-mitzvahs.  I can be reached in the comments section of this blog.

Thank you for your continued support.

Revised Campaign Schedule

Below is the original schedule I had posted last week:

Wednesday – Pittsburgh, PA (I will be discussing how the steel industry is a leading cause of air pollution.  I will also discuss the social ills of sexual misconduct among professional athletes.)

Thursday – Akron, OH (Was originally going to be in Cleveland, but changed location due to the LeBron James fiasco.  Turns out to be a bad idea because not only is Akron Cavaliers country, but it’s where LeBron was born and raised.)

Friday – Detroit, MI (I’ll think of something)

Saturday – Hamilton, ON (Where better to discuss my foreign policy than in a foreign country?  With some negotiations, the United States can divert going to was against our neighbors to the north.)

Sunday – Buffalo, NY (My birthplace   I was raised in Washington DC, but I was born in Buffalo as my parents were driving from Hamilton to what was supposed to be Albany, NY to visit my father’s old college roommate.  I was born in the car just before crossing the border {It took two hours to cross the border that day} and I stayed in a Buffalo hospital.

Due to my daughter’s safety, I had to drive her to Washington yesterday instead of having her go home with my father on Sunday.  I also had a heavy work load, which prohibited me from bring Patricia sooner.  I had to take Detroit and Hamilton off my campaign schedule and replaced it with Hartford and Newark.  Below is the new revised schedule:

Thursday (Today) – Pittsburgh, PA (I will be discussing how the steel industry is a leading cause of air pollution.  I will also discuss the social ills of sexual misconduct among professional athletes.)

Friday – Akron, OH (Was originally going to be in Cleveland, but changed location due to the LeBron James fiasco.  Turns out to be a bad idea because not only is Akron Cavaliers country, but it’s where LeBron was born and raised.)

Saturday – Buffalo, NY (My birthplace   I was raised in Washington DC, but I was born in Buffalo as my parents were driving from Hamilton to what was supposed to be Albany, NY to visit my father’s old college roommate.  I was born in the car just before crossing the border {It took two hours to cross the border that day} and I stayed in a Buffalo hospital.

Sunday (Morning) – Hartford, CT – I will discuss the great things that Gary Bettman and the NHL have done for the city of Hartford.

Sunday (Afternoon) – Newark, NJ – My Health Care plan and the implementation in urban communities.   Included will be plans of building multi-level orchards in a greenhouse environment which will allow more apples to be grown in a limited space.

There will be many trips like this as well as weeks when I campaign while working on the road.  I will also have to make time for debates against President Obama as well as the Republican and Tea Party Parties candidates.)

Campaign Photos Wanted

Ahmnodt Heare for America. Ahmnodt Heare for You.

It has come to my attention that I have no pictures of me from the campaign trail.  I am asking anybody who has taken pictures of me to please send a copy to my campaign.  In return, I will give you credit for the picture on the blog and I will also sign a copy of the picture you send in.  I would also like video clips of the campaign.  (Unfortunately, I cannot sign video clips, but I will send an autographed picture.)

Small Town Blues

I have done just about everything I wanted to do in my town yesterday.  I haven’t gone to the water park yet, but the weather hasn’t been promising for water rides.  My daily activities include going to the diner just so I get out of the house.

One of the things I am doing while I’m home is working on my unauthorized autobiography.  The name of the book is tentatively titled, “Ahmnodt for You.”  The problem I am having in writing it is that I don’t know if I want to write is as a life story with a small emphasis on my 2008 and 2012 campaigns or if I should emphasize my campaigns with just enough tidbits about my life to make people understand why I am running for president.

Some time will be spent on doing minor repairs around my house.  I need a few small things like a new toilet tank and a new bedroom wall.  These things shouldn’t take too long to fix. Off to the hardware store!

A Day of Campaigning

I have decided to take people inside what a day of campaigning is like for me.  The following occurred Friday 1, 2009:

6:00AM – Wake up, turn the alarm off, do the three “S’s”,  make coffee, grits, and toast.  Watch local news and jot stuff down.

7:00AM – Watch “Good Morning American” until it gets geared towards topics for women.  Get dressed.  Watch “Fox and Friends” until 8:00.

8:00 – Get on the internet, read and reply to e-mail, check blog replies, go on YoVille and get coins for hanging out with friends.  Read various news websites like Drudge, CNN.com, Wall Street Journal, and The Onion.

9:00 – Call radio station for scheduled 9:07 interview.  Gets canceled due to around-the-clock coverage of the “Swine Flu”.  No reschedule as of yet.

9:10 – Head to local diner to discuss issues with patrons and staff (when the owner wasn’t watching).  People were more concerned with the economy and jobs than they were about the Swine Flu or even the CineMafia.

10:00 – Go to the library and do research on various topics for future speeches.  The topics I can’t find at the library I can usually find at the adult book store down the street.

12:00 – Home for lunch: Macaroni and Cheese and two hot dogs.  Watch the news networks.  Send out e-mails to various media outlets explaining my availability for interviews.  Call mother and Grandma Oudda and find out how they’re doing.

1:00 – Check on business – call clients and make sure they are happy with previous efforts and remind them of my future availability.  Work on some work-related projects.

3:00 – Interviewed by a Dutch political website for their “foreign affairs” section.  They seemed confused that I didn’t vote for Obama or McCain and did not understand that I ran for president in 2008 and voted for myself.

4:00 – Oprah!  I can’t miss Oprah.  Especially in May.  May “Sweeps Months” brings out the “Very Special” Oprah shows and I do not want to miss those!

5:00 – Walk around the neighborhood.  This is my exercise for the day.  It also clears my mind.

5:30 – check e-mails and voice mail.  Respond to those I can.  Skim Drudge and Weekly World News.

6:00 – Dinner – Burgers on the grill, corn on the cob, and green beans.

7:00 – Take cab to Veterans’ Lodge – read speech and make last minute revisions.  Rehearse speech for rest of hour once I arrive.

8:00 – Speeches:  I am the third speaker of the evening.  The first two speeches were about veterans’ benefits.  I got up and before I got to speak, this grizzly looking Vietnam Vet looked at me like I farted on his mama.  The people didn’t like my “Culture War” speech at first, but once I explained to them how it affected their well-being and their lives, they became very accepting.  Even the grizzly guy seemed to agree with me.  Received a warm ovation and hung out to listen to the rest of the speeches.

9:30 – Take cab home.  Check e-mail, blog, voice mail, and social networking websites. Correspond accordingly to all of the above.

10:15 – Work on speeches, editorials, blog, and book.  Check schedule for future events.

12:00 – Bed