Ahmnodt Heare for President

Ahmnodt Heare For America… Ahmnodt Heare For You.

Energy and Climate Change

Climate change is a natural occurrance.   Energy does not cause climate change but its use is increased when it gets hotter or colder.

September 7, 2011 Posted by | environment, Reagan Library Debate | , | Comments Off on Energy and Climate Change

Double Blog Duty

For some people, this blog is not enough for their daily Ahmnodt fix.  I have tried to convince them to seep professional help, but to no avail.  After much fretting in my mind, I have finally caved in.  For the entire month of May, (Sundays excluded) I will also be blogging at my other blog, Formulated Randomness.  The theme for the month of May will be the A-Z of my life.

I had been spending the last week dog-sitting for a client up in the Catskills.  Murray got to play with some other dogs.  It was a lot more work than I thought as the other dogs all had a ton of energy.  As President, I would put those dogs (and other dogs with a lot of energy) on a treadmill attached to a turbine.  This will lessen our dependence on foreign oil.

I also picked up an impromptu client while picking up lunch at a local deli.  I only picked it up because the project was supposed to be easy and be only one day.  I have been very busy and am not only getting a chance to unwind as my usual client has returned.

I’m back home and planning for tomorrow night’s podcast.  It will be about current events as well as campaign updates.

May 5, 2011 Posted by | Ahmnodt, blogtalk radio, campaign, humor | , , | 6 Comments

Another Look at my Energy Plan

One of my first radio shows on BlogTalk Radio dealt with alternative energy.  It was back in 2008 when gas was $4.00 per gallon.  I was the first presidential candidate to suggest using multiple alternative energy sources.  (Why just windmills?  Why just hydro-power?  Why just cow farts?)  I suggested using it all.  John McCain later offered a watered-down version of my plan, but it was too late.

Fast forward to March 11, 2011.  A devastating earthquake hits northern Japan.  The earthquake caused an explosion at the Fukushima nuclear power plant.  A scenario like this can happen in the United States.  There are at least two nuclear power plants in the Unites States that are built on fault lines.  They say that safeguards are in place; but in the end, nature always beats man.

I am not against nuclear power plants.  I am against nuclear power plants on fault lines.  It’s like having a Weight Watcher’s meeting at McDonald’s.  It just doesn’t work.  Never did and never will.

If you can’t beat them, join them.  I know we can’t beat nature.  We can use what nature is willing to give us for energy.  This isn’t just for the windmills, hydro-power, and cow farts I mentioned earlier.  This also include other ways to merge nature and science.  Cloning hamsters and running them in a wheel to generate electricty is an option.  The cloning will assure we don;t run out of hamsters and make hamsters cost prohibitive.

My thoughts and prayers are with the people in Japan.  Hopefully we can learn from this and better ourselves without risking lives.

March 12, 2011 Posted by | Ahmnodt, commentary, editorial, environment, humor, satire | , , , , , , | 3 Comments

The Days Ahead

This is a slow week for my business, but starting next week, I will be busy for the next two months.  The Christmas strategies I have set up for my clients are in the implementation stage.  Basically, the week will comprise of spending 30-40 minutes a day looking at data and not much else.  The first Monday in December is when my clients start looking for a new campaign for the new year.  The first week in January is when I start picking up new clients as they are looking for a new marketing plan and get better results.

My work day started at 8:30AM and ended at 9:10.  It will be like that the rest of the week,  This will give me a lot of time to campaign.  It starts tonight as I go to Kiryas Joel, NY for the lighting of the town’s menorah celebrating the start of Hanukkah.  I will campaign there until 7:30 before heading home and setting up for tonight’s podcast at 9:00PM Eastern.

Tomorrow will be spent at the morgue as I campaign to those who have recently deceased as many of them are still registered to vote and will remained registered if they vote in 2012,  The night will be spent going to neighborhood bars campaigning to drunks before they pass out.

Thursday will be spent at gas stations touting my energy plan.  Gas prices have spiraled upward in recent weeks and I want to put a stop to it.  I will also go to Rahway State Prison and campaign on death row.  (As soon as they are executed, they will be dead and be able to vote,)

I will not campaign during the day on Friday as I will have to spend some time Christmas shopping.  I think I will buy bschooled some tampons so she can make some of her critically acclaimed tampon sculptures.  Friday night will be spent in town.  I will campaign as the town’s Christmas tree is lit during an otherwise boring ceremony.

I will be quite busy even though I will not be working.

November 30, 2010 Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, humor, issues, politics, satire | , , , , , , , | 9 Comments

My Daylight Saving Time Proposal

NOTE:  This was originally published on March 7, 2008.

At 2:00 Sunday Morning, most Americans will set their clocks and watches ahead one hour. Arizona and Hawaii won’t get to participate, so they won’t lose the hour of sleep that the rest of us will. My idea for Daylight Saving Time is different. My plan calls for setting the clocks ahead five hours. Critics claim that it will be dark while we wake up, it would be light out when we leave work and for the rest of the night. There would be no need for lamps after work. The only time lighting would be needed would be getting ready for work. Once I’d switch, I wouldn’t switch back. Few people can sleep 13 hours, so we’d all be waking up in the middle of the night.

March 8, 2009 Posted by | Ahmnodt, issues | , , | 2 Comments

A Brief Synopsis

I want to give a brief synopsis of President Obama’s speech and Governor Jindal’s response.  I was originally going to give a longer reply, but I have suddenly gotten ill.  If you want any further insight into how I felt after either speech, please send an e-mail to ahmnodtheare@politician.com.  Please note that all submissions become the property of the Ahmnodt heare for President campaign and may be used against you in the court of law.  Object is larger than appears in the mirror.  That’s it for the legalese.

Neither Obama nor Jindal touched the high price of entertainment.  Neither approached the affordability of my health plan.  President Obama’s energy plan does not cover the breadth of my program.  And I have the most comprehensive plan to stop corporate welfare.

We have a long way to go before people in office listen to my ideas.  I hope it’s not too late before they get it.

February 25, 2009 Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, commentary, debt, economy, editorial, environment, health care, Obama, politics, satire | , | Comments Off on A Brief Synopsis

Why My View on Global Warming Will Save Billions

Many politicians believe that global warming is a bad thing and that we must stop it.  Many others believe that global warming doesn’t exist.  My plan will save billions in energy costs.

We must discourage global warming in the summer.  It is too hot in the summer in many parts of the world.  Making the world warmer will just use up electricty to run air conditioners.

We must encourage global warming in the winter.  Warming the planet will reduce the need to burn gas and oil to heat up houses.

Turning problems into solutions is a trait a president needs to have in order to succeed.  Please vote for me on November 6, 2012.

December 2, 2008 Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, economy, environment, issues | , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

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