I will be hitting the road tomorrow and will be spending the weekend campaigning in the Lower Hudson Valley section (West of the Hudson). Tomorrow night is technically not a campaign stop, but I will be attending a fundraiser for victims of spousal and parental abuse. Spousal abuse is not one of those topics that is controversial. People are either against it or they are the perpetrators.
Saturday morning will be spent at a street corner somewhere in Marlboro, NY where I will be unveiling my new contraception plan. The Supreme Court recently ruled that Hobby Lobby (and other companies) are not obligated to provide medical coverage for contraception. My plan is to have contraception drop-off sites and give the contraception to people who have been complaining about the ruling. These people need contraception and we need to give them contraception because the last need we need is for these people reproducing.
There will be two stops on Saturday evening. The first stop will be at the Hudson Water Club in West Haverstraw, NY. I will give a speech on water pollution and how to clean up the Hudson River. I will have the filter from my fish tank ready as soon as I can find an extension cord to plug the filter so it can operate. (There are no outlets in the Hudson River as far as I know.) The second will be at the Lexington Bar and Grill in Bardonia. I will either offer a sensible property tax plan or I will offer advice on how to move out of the area. What I speak about depends on the mood of the crowd. If they start lighting torches and moving towards me, I will change the subject.
I will be in Nanuet on Sunday morning, but only to pick up the world famous rolls from Rockland Bakery. They deliver rolls from New England to Delaware. My campaign manager swears by them, so I will do him a favor and pick him up some rolls.
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July 17, 2014
Posted by Ahmnodt Heare |
Ahmnodt, campaign, humor, satire | abuse, Bardonia, contraception, finance, Hudson River, Hudson Valley, Hudson Water Club, Lexington Bar and Grill, Marlboro, Rockland Bakery, West Haverstraw |
Comments Off on New York Campaign Stops
In the past I have talked about how I would create jobs. Creating jobs won’t mean much without a sound economic vision because companies won’t make the money they need to maintain employment.
I will try to lay out my banking and finance strategy without boring you to tears. This won’t be easy because thinking about bores me to tears. But once the plan is implemented, you will be pleased with how things are going to go.
My banking plan will simply banking, remove or lower many banking fees, and make loans more readily available while allowing banks to make money. I would eliminate checking and saving fees and lower cash advances from ATM machines to $1.00 per transaction. Banks would make their money from interest-free loans from the Federal Reserve once the government takes it over (more on this in a minute) and by increasing the limit on interest rate on homes and automobiles.
The Constitution states that Congress is supposed to be in charge of minting monies. Therefore, the Federal Reserve is unconstitutional. I also believe that the government is better suited to print money out of thin air than any private institution like the Federal Reserve.
My plan will allow banks to make more money, allow people to keep more of their own money so they can spend it on stuff and keep stores open and able to keep employees.
I apologize if you were bored but you will be excited when you have more money to spend. This is one reason why I am running for President. I also want more money to spend.
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June 7, 2012
Posted by Ahmnodt Heare |
campaign, commentary, economy, editorial, issues, satire | bank fees, banking, Federal Reserve, finance, loans, money |
4 Comments
Ahmnodt Heare for President 
My Economic Policy
In the past I have talked about how I would create jobs. Creating jobs won’t mean much without a sound economic vision because companies won’t make the money they need to maintain employment.
I will try to lay out my banking and finance strategy without boring you to tears. This won’t be easy because thinking about bores me to tears. But once the plan is implemented, you will be pleased with how things are going to go.
My banking plan will simply banking, remove or lower many banking fees, and make loans more readily available while allowing banks to make money. I would eliminate checking and saving fees and lower cash advances from ATM machines to $1.00 per transaction. Banks would make their money from interest-free loans from the Federal Reserve once the government takes it over (more on this in a minute) and by increasing the limit on interest rate on homes and automobiles.
The Constitution states that Congress is supposed to be in charge of minting monies. Therefore, the Federal Reserve is unconstitutional. I also believe that the government is better suited to print money out of thin air than any private institution like the Federal Reserve.
My plan will allow banks to make more money, allow people to keep more of their own money so they can spend it on stuff and keep stores open and able to keep employees.
I apologize if you were bored but you will be excited when you have more money to spend. This is one reason why I am running for President. I also want more money to spend.
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June 7, 2012 Posted by Ahmnodt Heare | campaign, commentary, economy, editorial, issues, satire | bank fees, banking, Federal Reserve, finance, loans, money | 4 Comments