Ahmnodt Heare for President

Ahmnodt Heare For America… Ahmnodt Heare For You.

An Apology to Canadians

My foreign policy is probably the most controversial part of my platform.  I know that many Canadians find me to be unpopular because of my insistence that I would have pulled the U.S. troops out of the Middle East and into Canada.  I have no qualms with the Canadian people, it is with the Canadian government.

Despite my foreign policy towards Canada, I would not have done something as inhumane as what the United States government has done to Canada – send President Barack Obama to your country for the G-20 S.  As an American, I feel the pain Canadians are going through.  I feel a special sorrow for Toronto Blue Jays fans.  They were deprived of three home games against the Philadelphia Phillies this weekend.  Those games will now be played in Philadelphia instead of Toronto.  I am not angered by this because this benefits a division rival.  I take that back, it bothers me greatly that the Phillies are getting three extra home games.

Once I am elected President, I will make sure that Barack Obama, George W. Bush, and Lady Gaga never infiltrate your country.  All I ask is that Canada takes back William Shatner, Celine Dion, and Justin Bieber so America can once again have untainted entertainment.

On behalf of America throughout the United States and the military bases in the 150 countries we are occupying, please accept my apology.  We will take Barack Obama back by Sunday.

June 25, 2010 Posted by | campaign, Canada, commentary, editorial, humor, Obama, War | , , , , , | 2 Comments

Campaign Lull

For those who follow this blog regularly, you have noticed that I haven’t blogged everyday and my blog entries have been smaller.  There are two reasons for this:

1 – Life sometimes gets in the way of running an efficient campaign.  I have been working a lot.  I have also been taking care of my grandmother, who has never fully recovered from the infamous mosh pit incident at the Seniors’ Center.

2- Lack of inspiration from political events.  I can’t get myself invited to G-20 or Pan-American summits.  I am working on a plan to stop piracy off the coast of Africa.

3- NHL Playoffs.  My Capitals are finally in the playoffs.  After losing the first two games of the playoffs to the New York Rangers, we finally got things going with a 4-0 trouncing of the Rangers in New York.  I really need the Caps to win this because I am living in the New York area in an area contaminated with Rangers and Devils fans.  The best thing Caps coach Bruce Boudreau Boudreau-Ghali did was yank Jose Theodore from goal and replaced him with Simeon Varlamov.

I am hoping that my workload will lighten soon and that my grandmother gets better.  I am also hoping to bring better blog entries soon.

April 22, 2009 Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, satire | , , , , , , | Comments Off on Campaign Lull

   

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