Ahmnodt Heare for President

Ahmnodt Heare For America… Ahmnodt Heare For You.

Sometimes Doing Your Best Is Not Enough

I write with deep sadness that Ram Venkatararam was sentenced to 25 years in prison for what I believe is a bogus kidnapping charge.  Ram was not allowed to present my theory to the court and now he is spending his evenings romancing Bubba.

I have tried to help Ram.  I have offered my testimony.  I wrote a letter to the District Attorney disproving that Ram kidnapped John-Sam.  I took the judge and his staff out for dinner.  None of these traditional methods worked.

There are a few things we can do.  One thing we can do is plead for an appeal.  We can also ask President Obama to pardon Ram. We can find a baker who knows how to bake cakes and hide files.  We can all mail Ram a card to keep his spirits up.

Moral of the story:  Just because you have sucked at what you have been doing doesn’t mean you should give up.  Don’t give up until you have ran out of options.

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May 3, 2009 Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, editorial, issues | , , , , | Comments Off on Sometimes Doing Your Best Is Not Enough

Free Ram Venkatararam!

If anybody happens to see Ram, make sure he gets this card:  monopoly-get-out-of-jail-free-card

Ram is innocent of the kidnapping charges and I can prove it.  In order to a charge kidnapping on somebody, one criterion is that the person kidnapped had to want to stay from the place where he or she was snatched.  There is no evidence that John-Sam wanted to stay.  A kidnap victim would also return to the place where he or she was kidnapped.  There is no sign of John-Sam at the Krishna compound.  He was last seen with Doris, the Snapple delivery lady.

if the Krishnas thought he was kidnapped, there would have been posters all over the place and a TV ad telling people to call 1-800-KRISHNA if John-Sam had been spotted.

There will be a candlelight vigil in front of the 7-11 nearest the Food Here Convenience Store Saturday at Noon.

April 9, 2009 Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, issues, satire | , , , , | 7 Comments

   

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