Ahmnodt Heare for President

Ahmnodt Heare For America… Ahmnodt Heare For You.

Greetings from Liechtenstein!

It is 4:46AM and I cannot sleep.  I am currently in Schaanwald (at the border with Austria.  The walk-a-thon will start at 9AM and will go through the towns of Nendeln, Planken, and Schaad before arriving at Vaduz, the capital.  Vaduz is near the border with Switzerland.  There will be a rally at Rheinpark Stadon and cookies will be served.

The cross-country trip is approximately 7 miles.  People here are outraged at the price of entertainment.  Because Euros are used here, it only makes it more expensive.  They were having similar infiltration of “entertainers” Ace of Base invading from Sweden in the 1990s, and they feel our pain with Anne Murray and William Shattner being in our country.  For some reason, they seem to like Celine Dion, but I digress.

Soon after the rally, I will fly to Amsterdam.  I was hoping to spend more time here, but I have been informed that in addition to the prostitution, I should analyze a couple of the hashish establishments.  They told me I should a lot of time for analyzing the hashish houses and the brothels before coming up with a policy.  My luck must be pretty good because some of the prostitutes I will be analyzing will be staying at the same hotel I am staying.

March 17, 2009 Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, foreign policy, issues, Platform, satire | , , , , , , | Comments Off on Greetings from Liechtenstein!

Back in Louisville

My court appearance is tomorrow morning.  I found an attorney who said that I will probably pay a fine and get two years probation.  I suppose I could  live with that.  It could have been a lot worse.

I heard a story of a police officer who had to be rushed to the hospital after eating a brownie that he and his wife made.  Maybe it’s a good thing I didn’t eat the brownie I bought in the park last time I was here.

June 2, 2008 Posted by | Uncategorized | , , , | 1 Comment

Out on Bail

I am out of jail after paying $1000 bail.  I was charged for possession of drugs.  The reason I am writing this is because you need to know what really happened and not what the Louisville Police are going to say.

It was around 9PM and I was walking through Cherokee Park in Louisville, KY.  A young man walked up to me and asked if I wanted to buy a brownie.  I knew the people in Kentucky were nice, but to offer to sell brownies at night us one of the nicer things I have seen in a long time.  I asked how much and he said $5.  I thought $5 was a lot of money for a brownie, but he seemed like a nice guy and I was getting hungry after spending most of the day campaigning.

He gave me the brownie in a brown paper bag.  I continued walking when two police officers approached me.  They asked me what was in the bag and I told them it was a brownie I just bought.  Then I asked me who I bought the brownie from and I told them I didn’t know the man’s name, but he seemed friendly.

The police took the bag and took the brownie out of the bag.  They broke the brownie in half and started to pick the leaves out of the brownie.  One of them then walked behind me and told me to place my hands on the back of my head.  The other one frisked me and made sure I didn’t have anything on me.

“Why am I arrested?”  I asked.

“Possession of Drugs,” replied the officer, “There’s hashish in this brownie.”

“How am I supposed to know that?” I asked.

Next thing I know, I was in the police station being photographed and fingerprinted.  They took my information and placed me in a cell for the night.  This morning I was in front of a judge and was charged with 3rd degree possession drug possession.  It carries a possible sentence of up to a year.

Soon after, I paid my bail and left.  I have a court date on June 10.

May 18, 2008 Posted by | Ahmnodt, election, satire, scandal, speech | , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

   

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