Ahmnodt Heare for President

Ahmnodt Heare For America… Ahmnodt Heare For You.

2012 in Review – March

One would assume since most of the month was spent between vacation and illness, that this would be a non-productive month with no major accomplishments.  I managed to get a lot done in the few days I got to do stuff.

I became the first (and only) candidate in 2012 to devise a plan to prevent natural disasters.  Others have taken on the fight against the Cinemafia.  Then there was this cute little piece on why I would be a better candidate than any corporate cartoon character.  The high prices at supermarkets seemed to have affected me more than other candidates.

I somehow managed to run my business while I was hospitalized.  Further complications arose when my parents decided to get a separation and both planned a surprise visit to my place on the same day.  I lost the one delegate I had won for the Republican National Convention due to Republicans cheating a technicality.

March was a few moral victories sandwiching a physical defeat.  It sounds nice, but moral victories would not catapult me to the White House.


December 23, 2012 Posted by | Ahmnodt, issues, satire | , , , | 1 Comment

Shopping Woes

Unlike the other presidential candidates, I have been in a supermarket in my lifetime.  I have been doing my own shopping so I know the horrors of sticker shock first hand.   I have developed carpal tunnel syndrome from clipping so many coupons in an attempt to get everything I want to get in the supermarket.

The excuses for the constant increases in coffee prices are as lame as the excuses for the constant increases in gas prices.  Too much rain in Columbia, not enough rain in Kenya, too cold in Greenland.  I have heard all of the excuses for spikes in coffee prices and frankly, I am sick of them.

While there are a ton of excuses for the spikes in coffee prices, I haven’t heard any for the spikes in the prices for pastas.  We don’t get our pasta from Columbia or Kenya, so weather isn’t a factor.  it has long since been discovered that spaghetti doesn’t grow on trees.  The price of pasta has doubled over the last four years and I demand to know why!  It seems the stuff I buy the most of has risen more than stuff I avoid like the Plague.

I don’t have all of the answers to the food prices, but I do have one answer that will lower prices for some foods.  We need to stop paying farmers not to grow food.  The more food, the cheaper.  We also have to quit exporting food only to import some of the same food at a higher price.

You can vote for a candidate who can’t tell the difference between a shopping cart and a dolly or you can vote for someone who has walked in your shoes.  I have walked in your shoes and will return them by the end of the week.

March 14, 2012 Posted by | Ahmnodt, commentary, economy, editorial, humor, satire | , , , , , , , , | 9 Comments

Getting it From All Over

I promised Hector from Buffalo that I would discuss further into his predicament over the rising cost and decreased quantity of rolling tobacco.  I did some research and came up with some interesting results:

The practice of decreasing quantity of a product started in the 1980s.  Inflation was a killer in the late 1970s and early 1980s.  People were moaning loudly about prices rising all of the time.  A few companies figured they would decrease the quantity of their products instead of raising their prices.  Cereal boxes were known for this practice.  Cereals that used to come in 1 lb. boxes.  They were soon appearing in 14.5 oz. boxes.  (They kept the boxes them size the same size in volume to make it appear that nothing has changed.)

Hector’s situation is a bit more severe.   There were two items being decreased (rolling paper by 20% and tobacco by 13%) and prices went up from $1.99 for 40 papers and .75oz of tobacco to $5.39 for 32 papers and .65oz of tobacco.  This means he has gone from $0.04975 for a .0373oz cigarette to paying $0.1684375 for a 0.0203125 cigarette.  This is paying more than triple for a smaller cigarette.

I could not find any phone numbers or e-mails for any of the roll-your-own tobacco companies.  I did find an address so I wrote a letter to whom it may concern.  I will post the letter and the reply as soon as I get a reply.

July 19, 2010 Posted by | campaign, commentary | , , , , | 2 Comments

Why I Should Have Been Elected

Every once in a while (although lately it seems to be frequently), I come across a news story that shows Americans acting as if I won the election.  AT the very least, they are not waiting until I am elected to enact my policy on senior citizens.

The dog food is enjoying higher food sales despite tough economic times.  The news article claims that it is because more people have dogs.  The dog population did not increase that much.  What has increased is the number of people who have become senior citizens.

Human food has shot up over the last two years.  People on a fixed income cannot afford the increased prices, so they resort to dog food.  This is especially true among seniors.  As the economy worsens, more seniors will be eating dog food.

If this was a case of people caring more about their pets, then there would have been an increase in the sales of chew toys and bones.  This does not appear to be the case.  While many seniors can be seen buying dog food, few seniors are seen with dogs.

Between this story and the arrest of Cinemafioso Roman Polanski, people have embraced my platform.  By electing me for President in 2012, it will become easier to enact the rest of my platform.

September 29, 2009 Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, economy, editorial, humor, issues, Platform, satire, senior citizens | , , , , , | 7 Comments

“How to Solve the Gas Crisis” – Sunday 10PM Eastern

Independent Write-In Candidate Ahmnodt Heare will be the first candidate for president to offer a comprehensive plan to make energy affordable for Americans. Tune in to his show Sunday, April 27 at 10:00PM Eastern / 7:00PM Pacific.  If you can’t catch it live, you can listen to the archive at the link below.


April 25, 2008 Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, election, Platform, speech | , , , , , | Comments Off on “How to Solve the Gas Crisis” – Sunday 10PM Eastern

Food Costs Rising Fastest in 17 Years

Food Costs Rising Fastest in 17 Years: Financial News – Yahoo! Finance

One thing we can do is to quit paying farmers not to grow crops. If we are going to pay people not to do something, maybe we can pay Congress not to write any laws. Many of the laws they have written lately have been stupid. We can also pay the military not to fight in preemptive wars. Both of these make more sense than paying farmers not to grow food when the demand for food is so high.

Maybe people can pay me not to blog or to not run for president. It would take more money than allowable by law. We could pay Dick Cheney not to hide. Or pay cheerleaders not to wear clothes. (Where do I send the check for the last one?)

Let the farmers grow food and don’t export food until we have more stable food prices.

April 15, 2008 Posted by | campaign, Platform | , , , , , , | Comments Off on Food Costs Rising Fastest in 17 Years


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