Ahmnodt Heare for President

Ahmnodt Heare For America… Ahmnodt Heare For You.

Observations on Recent Events

I spent most of today trying to catch up on what has been happening in the news since Election Day.  I haven’t watched the news because I have been vacationing and I had custody of my daughter for most of the last week.  Below is my synopsis of some recent events:

  • Colorado and Washington legalizing marijuana for recreational use –  I support this and on the surface this is good news.  There is bad news and I will explain that later.
  • Petraeusgate – Former CIA Director David Petraeus resigned following a much-publicized sex scandal.  My campaign could use publicity like that.  I am not below admitting that I can use the sex.
  • Israel vs. Hamas and the Palestinians – I have received heat for what I am about to say in the past, but it bears repeating.  The United States should not get involved in the conflict until the Canadian dilemma is settled.  Canadian spies like William Shatner, Celine Dion, and Justin Bieber infiltrating and sabotaging the Great American Entertainment Industry must be deported and American entertainment must be restored to its greatness.
  • Hostess Closing Down – This is bad news on many levels.  I blame the marketing team for the folding of the company.  While it is easy to blame the management for being overpaid or the unions for wanting too much, I blame the marketing team for undervaluing their products.  I would have sold Twinkees at 40% higher than the suggested retail price.  They were at least that much better than Little Debbie’s.  Legalizing marijuana just isn’t the same withoout munching on Twinkees or Ho-Ho’s.

Tonight is my last night in Virginia Beach.  I head to my parents’ home in Washington, DC tomorrow for Thanksgiving week and head home Friday afternoon.

November 18, 2012 Posted by | Ahmnodt, Canada, commentary, editorial, humor, issues, satire, scandal, War | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Comments Off on Observations on Recent Events

Foreign Aid

Our foreign policy makes no sense when it comes to foreign aid.  We give money ti Israel and the Palestinians so they can bomb each other.  I would quit sending foreign aid until they learn to get along.  At the very least, they would no longer have money for bombs.

September 22, 2011 Posted by | commentary, debate, foreign policy, Orlando | , , | Comments Off on Foreign Aid

My Message is Reaching the Entire World

It is sad that the United States is not the only country having to deal with the Cinemafia.  This is why I was pleased that an Israeli MP is planning to do something about it.  The “Yediot Aharonot” newspaper (Not to be confused with the Cinemafia-ran The “Idiot Ahmnodt” newspaper) is reporting that Likud Party MP Carmel Shama plans to introduce legislation that would make popcorn more affordable in theaters.

Shama said, “We have to put an end to this. The public should not have to mortgage their houses for a soft drink and a snack,”  I could not agree with him more.  I first mentioned this live-blogging one of the Obama-McCain debates.  It is refreshing to see not only my message resonating, but hopefully soon to be enacted.

March 31, 2010 Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, cinemafia, commentary, entertainment, humor, legislation, politics, satire | , , , , , | 1 Comment

How I Would Solve the Israeli – Palestinian Mess

Israel and Palestine have been going at it since I was a kid.  There have been moments of truces only to end up with both sides fighting again.  My solution is two-fold:  Bomb Israel, Gaza, and the West Bank with reefer bombs and to set up falafel and kabob stands near the bombed areas.

Marijuana puts the mind at ease.  People aren’t in the mood to fight when they are stoned.  Marijuana also causes the munchies.  If America ran the falafel and kabob stands I mentioned earlier, then we will be able to pay for the reefer bombings without using taxpayers’ dollars.

A well-fed and stoned people is a happy and peaceful people.  This will bring peace to the Middle East.

January 8, 2009 Posted by | Ahmnodt, commentary, editorial, foreign policy, issues, satire, War | , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

Would You Wait for a UN Resolution to Protect Israel if Israel was Attacked?

I would not wait for the United Nations for any foreign policy action I would take.  I would consult a psychic and make sure that I am doing the right thing

October 7, 2008 Posted by | campaign, debate, election, foreign policy, issues, Platform, satire | , , | 3 Comments

   

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