Ahmnodt Heare for President

Ahmnodt Heare For America… Ahmnodt Heare For You.

A “Blemished” Game

Armando Galarraga of the Detriot Tigers pitched a perfect game against the Cleveland Indians last night.  The only problem with Galarraga’s perfect game is that Major League Baseball is not going to recognize it as a perfect game.

Jason Donald was batting in the top of the ninth inning with two out and nobody on.  Armando Galarraga had already retired the first 26 batters he faced.  The “Other”Donald (just so nobody confuses him with Donald Trump) hit the ball to the right side of the infield.  The ball was hit pretty far to the right of Tigers’ First Baseman Miguel Cabrera (Not Orlando).  Cabrera had to get the grounder and throw the ball to Galarraga, who was hustling to first base.  The video below is the best video available of the play without infringing on Major League Baseball’s broadcasting rights. (The “Any descriptions, images, or accounts of this game without prior written permission from Major League Baseball is prohibited.” line)

Watch any sports show tonight, they will show the replay.  (I guess they got permission from Major League Baseball.)  You will see that Armando Galarraga got to first base and that he caught the ball from Miguel Cabrera before Jason Donald got to first base.  The umpire James Joyce called him safe when he was clearly out.

This is not going to be a rant about James Joyce.  We all make mistakes.  Sometimes, our mistakes are at the most inopportune time or have drastic results.  To Joyce’s credit, he later admitted that he made a mistake and that he felt very bad.  The ball goes to Major League Baseball.  They could have decided to right a wrong  and declare that Galarraga pitched a perfect game.  There is precedence for decisions like this.  They credited Hack Wilson with an additional RBI in 2000 with a run he drove in in 1930.

I have decided to follow Michigan Governor Jennifer Granholm’s lead and declare that Armando Galarraga pitched a perfect game.  Some of my supporters have criticized me because Governor Granholm was born in Canada.  I have to reiterate that my gripe is with the Canadian government, not the Canadian people.  Besides, she is not ruining the entire United States, only Michigan.

Major League Baseball made an error by not overruling James Joyce’s call and awarded a perfect game to Galarraga.  Maybe I should give up running for President and instill some common sense to Major League Baseball.

June 3, 2010 Posted by | Ahmnodt, commentary, editorial, humor, satire | , , , , , , | 3 Comments

Some Updates

There are a few things I have to take care of that I have neglected.  Although I moved the campaign headquarters from Michigan to New York, there were things I had to take care of.

  • I tried to get Governor Jennifer Granholm to endorse me for 2012.  Unfortunately she is a Democratic Party hack and a Canadian.
  • There are no signs of Humpback Dolphins in Lake Michigan.  No charges have been filed against those responsible for killing off the dolphins.
  • Peasant Tim is currently the Michigan campaign manager.  I haven’t heard from him lately, but he is still the man.
  • The Hell’s Angels meeting that I was supposed to have in Stockholm did not materialize.  They found me and told me the meeting is now tomorrow in New York City and it would be in my best interest not to miss it.

I hope this is everything I had left behind.  The campaign will be moving forward.

October 25, 2009 Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, Canada, commentary, Democrats, editorial, endorsement, humor, satire, speech | , , , , , , | 3 Comments

New Headquarters

The new headquarters is in New York City, around the corner from The Disney Store.

The new headquarters is in New York City, around the corner from The Disney Store.

I have decided to move my headquarters from Michigan to New York City.  Although I still feel the actions by the McCain and Obama campaigns conclude that neither party cares about Michigan, I have to move to a more centralized location.

The new headquarters will be in midtown Manhattan near the family-friendly section of Times Square.  If you happen to be in the area, bring the family by.

I will be in Michigan from time to time as there are important programs that I must finish like the Jennifer Granholm conversion program.  I think that with a little bit of help, she will be an Ahmnodt Heare supporter.  There is also the humpback dolphin situation that has to be resolved.

I will leave Michigan campaign activities in good hands once the programs are finished.  If the hands aren’t good, I will supply hand cream and gloves.

December 22, 2008 Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, change, politics, satire | , , , , , , , , | 5 Comments

If Only Michelle Obama Knew

LANSING, Mich. (AP) – Michigan Gov. Jennifer Granholm can’t run for president, but she could still end up in Washington next year.

President-elect Barack Obama tapped the Democratic governor several times during his campaign to talk about the need to create new alternative energy jobs as traditional manufacturing jobs disappear.

Maybe if I tapped Governor Granholm a few times, I could have been president.

November 11, 2008 Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, election, Obama, politics, satire, scandal | , , , | Comments Off on If Only Michelle Obama Knew

Headquarters moving to Michigan

The Ahmnodt Heare for President campaign is moving to Michigan during the week.  The campaign feels it can take advantage of John McCain’s campaign leaving the state.  Ahmnodt Heare will remind the good people of Michigan that John McCain bailed out of the state when times got tough.  He would also make sure people in Michigan don’t forget that Barack Obama didn’t want Michigan to count in the Democratic primary. 

While in Michigan, I will organize volunteers in Detroit and Sault Ste. Marie and have them monitor the border crossings making sure Canadian entertainers do not taint our country.

October 6, 2008 Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, change, Obama, Platform, satire | , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments


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