Ahmnodt Heare for President

Ahmnodt Heare For America… Ahmnodt Heare For You.

2012 NFL Season – Week 13

Last Week:9-6-1 (.594) Best Bets: 2-1 (.667)
Season to Date: 82-92-2 (.472) Best Bets: 19-16-1 (.542)

Hard to believe, but I haven’t had a losing week since Week 6.  Maybe I know a few things about football after all.  It’s too bad that my picks for the first six week was like watching a porno flick with Nancy Pelosi having a threesome with John Boehner and Pat Buchanan.

I apologize for the imagery above.  I hope you weren’t eating.  I won’t do that again without ample warning.

 

Date & Time Favorite Spread Underdog
11/29 8:25 ET At Atlanta -3.5 New Orleans
12/2 1:00 ET At Chicago -3 Seattle
12/2 1:00 ET At Green Bay -8 Minnesota
12/2 1:00 ET San Francisco -7.5 At St. Louis
12/2 1:00 ET At NY Jets -5 Arizona
12/2 1:00 ET Carolina -3 At Kansas City
12/2 1:00 ET At Detroit -6 Indianapolis
12/2 1:00 ET At Buffalo -6 Jacksonville
12/2 1:00 ET New England -7.5 At Miami
12/2 1:00 ET Houston -6.5 At Tennessee
12/2 4:05 ET At Denver -7.5 Tampa Bay
12/2 4:25 ET At Baltimore -8 Pittsburgh
12/2 4:25 ET Cleveland -2.5 At Oakland
12/2 4:25 ET Cincinnati -1 At San Diego
12/2 8:30 ET At Dallas -10.5 Philadelphia

 

   Monday Night Football Point Spread

12/3 8:40 ET NY Giants -3 At Washington

December 1, 2012 Posted by | Ahmnodt, commentary, humor, NFL Picks, satire | , , , , | Comments Off on 2012 NFL Season – Week 13

I Should Have Ran for Congress

This has been a busy week thus far.  It’s 8:30PM and I just finished working for the day after starting at 7:00AM all week.  This is the first day this week I was able to finish before 10:00PM.  I am working more this week because I plan on taking two weeks off for vacation and campaigning starting Friday night.

Two weeks is a lot of time to be away from work, especially when you run your own business.  But the time off I will be taking is minuscule compared to what Congress takes off every year.  They are currently on a five-week vacation and won’t return to work until after Labor Day.  They also get a nice long vacation for Christmas/New Year’s and for Easter.  I think they’re trying to take off for Spring Break next year.  We can spend a week hangin’ with the homies John Boehner and Harry Reid.

The last time I had five weeks off was between my sophomore and junior years of high school.  I worked during my summer vacations after that:  First as a paperboy during after my junior year then as a pool boy after my senior year.  The pool boy job was interesting as I spent little time cleaning the pool for the Johnson’s when Mr. Johnson was working.  I spent more time picking up things around the pool under Mrs. Johnson’s constant supervision.  She always looked thirsty, and I told her she should be inside and cool off.  but she’d stay outside.

If I somehow lose the presidential election this November (90 days remaining), I might run for Congress in 2014.  I’ll make more money and work fewer hours.  It will be a win-win situation.  The best part is that I can run for President in 2016.

August 8, 2012 Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, election, humor, Personal Life, politics, satire | , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Out of the Loop

I am ashamed to admit this, but I did not realize that President Obama was addressing the nation last night.  I would have blogged my comments in real time as well as written why my plan would have been better.

I had an incredibly bust day today.  What didn’t help was a drunk guy knocking on my door at 2:30AM looking for his wife.  The dog wouldn’t stop barking at him.  He wouldn’t leave.  He stumbled through my apartment and knocked stuff off of tables and the counter.  He broke my “Hello Kitty” cookie jar.  The police came and soon took him away.

It took me a while to fall back to sleep.  This was a problem because I had to get up earlier than normal and my energy bars were in the cookie jar.  The dog’s inability to calm down and constant panting in my ear didn’t help matters.

Two clients called me and told me they needed their projects done by the end of the day.  One project was one that was originally due in two weeks.  The other was for a regular client’s Spring 2012 campaign which wasn’t due until December.  These projects were on top of the other projects due this week including a back-to-school campaign for a local chain of lingerie stores,

I missed President Obama’s address as well as Speaker John Boehner’s reply.  From watching the morning talk shows, it looks like I didn’t miss anything.  America missed an opportunity to not be in this fiscal mess to begin with electing somebody besides me in 2008.  This is why I need to be elected in 2012.

July 26, 2011 Posted by | Ahmnodt, commentary, editorial, humor, Obama, satire | , , , , | 5 Comments

Dreams

Americans have a dream of success.  How a working boy from Scranton can be a vice-president.  How a bar sweeper can be Speaker of the House of Representatives.   How a fired movie theater manager can be the 45th President of the United States.

January 25, 2011 Posted by | Ahmnodt, commentary, humor, Joe Biden, State of the Union 2010 | , | 3 Comments

Just an Observation

Speaker John Boehner lookssick.  I think he could go for an apple.  He looks like he is going to cry also.  I said apple, not onion.

January 25, 2011 Posted by | commentary, humor, State of the Union 2011 | | 1 Comment

Beware of These People!

There are two types of people I am concerned about:  those who threaten the American way of life and those who are undermining my campaign.

These people below are threatening American entertainment and must be stopped!

Anne Murray, Celine Dion, and William Shatter are Canadian spies whose mission is to undermine the American entertainment industry and tamper with America’s last remaining significant export.

Those listed above have either stolen my campaign ideas in their campaigns or have covertly undermined my 2008 and 2012 campaigns. (Except Neil Patrick Harris, he was added because I think he’s a tad odd.)

December 12, 2009 Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, Canada, commentary, editorial, election, entertainment, humor, politics, satire | , , , , , , , , , | 9 Comments

   

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