“The Titanic” and the Evilness of the CineMafia

“The Titanic” won an Oscar for “Best Picture” in 1997.  It was bad enough that the Motion Picture Academy overlooked such timeless classics as “Liar Liar” and “Men in Black.”  But it somehow managed to beat the other nominated movies of 1997, including “Good Will Hunting” and “The Full Monty.”  Both of those movies were better movies.

Picking the wrong movie isn’t what makes the CineMafia evil.  The evilness comes from them deciding to re-release the movie in theaters this weekend.    The evil comes from the timing of the re-release.  Sunday will be the 100th anniversary of the Titanic sinking.  The CineMafia thought it would be a good time to celebrate the sinking of the Titanic and the death of 1,514 people and make a few bucks while celebrating.  The movie will be in the traditional 2-D as well as in 3-D.

It is reasons like this why I have been boycotting major movies and have fighting the CineMafia as the foundation of my presidential campaign.  When the CineMafia is not celebrating death, they are turning 14-year old girls like Brittney Spears and Lindsay Lohan into underaged sex symbols only to toss them aside when they turn 18 and watch their lives turn into a train wreck.

I am the only presidential candidate who dares to take on the CineMafia and all the evil that it is.  Evil has flourished for too long and it is time to put an end to it.  Don’t see “The Titanic” or any other CineMafia production.  Starve them of their revenue and hopefully the movies will start getting good again like they were before 1984.  The more they are fed, the more evil they become.  If you have to watch something about a shipwreck this week, I would suggest watching “Gilligan’s Island.”  At least nobody died in the sinking of the S.S. Minnow.

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All For Naught

I was watching promos for a movie called “True Grit” and thought for a minute that the CineMafia was turning a leaf.  No, they weren’t going to drop the price of going to a movie or the prices at concession stands.  For a minute, I thought they were going to produce an entertaining movie of high quality.  Below is why I had this thought:

Wednesday Addams?

I should have suspected that the girl Hailee Steinfeld is portraying is not Wednesday Addams and that “True Grit” isn’t an awesome movie about the Addams family visiting the Wild West.  I should have noticed that although the movie has a Wednesday look-a-like, there was no Pugsley, Uncle Fester, Gomez, Morticia, Lurch, Grandma-ma, or Thing.  And that this “Wednesday Addams” wasn’t the least bit thrown off by such dangers as sunlight.

Another thing I am finding disturbing is how highly touted Hailee Steinfeld is being touted for a 14-year-old girl.  Somebody has to replace Miley Cyrus as the Cinemafia’s “darling” now that Miley has turned 18 and has turned to smoking salvia now that the Cinemafia doesn’t need her because she is 18.

Let’s not forget Lindsay Lohan.  She is currently being accused of kicking the crap of a rehab worker while she was undergoing rehab.  Let this be a warning for Hailey and her parents:  Do NOT follow the path of Lindsay Lohan, Miley Cyrus, and Britney Spears – no matter how tempting it may seem.  While there is nothing wrong with being a non-famous teenaged girl, there is something wrong with being a teenaged girl who follows fame only to end up having a train wreck of a life once turning 18.

The Curse of the Cinemafia

Miley Cyrus is cursed.  Her Cinemafia-induced fame and fortune is paying a toll on her personal life.  First, she had to endure the paparazzi (photographers paid by the Cinemafia to infiltrate the personal lives of celebrities) everywhere she went, including the infamous pantie-less photo.

The curse doesn’t end there.  Miley will now have to live with the pain of her parents’ divorcing.  This is sure to cause trauma to her achy breaky heart knowing that her parents, Billy Ray and Tish, are no longer together,  This will make custody hard as Miley will turn 18 in less than a month and there are not many “other weekends” between now and her 18th birthday.  Getting married will be difficult too as she will have to decide if she is going to get married on the weekend her father gets her or on the weekend her mother gets her.

The Cinemafia has made their millions off of Miley Cyrus.  They will soon toss her aside (Like they did with Annette Funicello, Britney Spears, and Lindsay Lohan) when she turns 18.  With her not knowing which parent to turn to, things will be very trying for poor Miley.

The Long Fight

I have to overhaul my entire campaign strategy.  I had to cancel the Walk-a-Thon for Affordable Entertainment Awareness after I heard the news that the Cinemafia has struck again,  The video I am about to post might have people accuse me of showing child pornography, but it is important to show how low the Cinemafia has sunk and why I have to fight harder:

This is troubling for many reasons.  Miley Cyrus is still a minor, but she will turn 18 next month.  This video is probably the Cinemafia’s last salvo at pimping Ms. Cyrus while she is still under 18.   It is their last attempt to appease to the bald middle-aged fat men living in their parents’ basements.  The Cinemafia is this demographic except that they moved out of their parents’ houses.

I saw my daughter this weekend.  She wants me to take her to a Miley Cyrus concert.  It’s not happening.  Not any time soon.  And the toughest part of being a parent is that the Cinemafia keeps pimping minors for their pleasure.  It works in cycles.  The cycle works like this:

• Find a cute girl aged 11 or 12.
• Star her in a show geared at 7-year-old girls.
• Let her “discover” her sexuality when she is 14 or 15.
• Make her star in a risqué and controversial video when she is 16.
• Let her do a borderline-slutty video when she is 17.
• Toss her aside once she turns 18 and watch her life become a train wreck.

Britney Spears started out as a Mouseketeer.  Lindsay Lohan started out as a child model.  Look at their careers from childhood to today.  Get ready for hearing Miley Cyrus in the news over her escapades in the years to come.  Watch the shows currently aimed at young girls.  It will be easy to spot the Cinemafia’s next tool of sexual deviance.

Spread the word, especially if you are the father of a young child like I am.  Find out what your children are watching and who they are watching.  Be a stronger influence on your child than her favorite show is on her.