I held a meeting this morning with my campaign team. It was supposed to be brief, but there seems to be friction in what direction the campaign should go. I finally got to meet my running mate met Albee Thayer today. Although he is an ass, he would still be a better vice-president than either Joe Biden or Paul Ryan.
The first thing the team squabbled about was how to get additional exposure. I had suggested that Albee Thayer get his own BlogTalk Radio show, WordPress Blog, and UStream channel. He preferred to maintain his course of writing letters to newspaper editors why Americans should vote for the Heare/Thayer ticket though none of his letters have yet to be published.
There are some on the team that suggest I start throwing money into the campaign. I had thought about buying some ads, but Albee reminded me that most of my supporters are voting for me because I have refused to throw money into the campaign. He said he has spent no money on my campaign but did help get some ads for Noes Toiaqui’s campaign when she ran for President of Mexico. (The one drawback with those ads was they were in English.)
The last issue was where to hold the Election Night party. I will be at the Legends Resort partaking in the semi-annual ” Orgies for Abstinence” awareness program. There are only 50 days until Election Day, meaning it’s only 51 days until the 2016 Election cycle begins.
One of my supporters was able to infiltrate a Cinemafia meeting. She was able to videotape a portion of the meeting and give the recording to me. They speak in different languages to prevent people from finding out what they are saying in meetings. Fortunately, the supporter speaks German and was able to put subtitles in the film clip so we can know what they are saying.
The frequency of my blogging may be limited over the next month. It is a busy month for the campaign as I have the “Orgies for Abstinence” event coming up on Election night (this coming Tuesday). I will be attending the Meeting of Independent Presidential Candidates from the 13th through the 21st in the Bahamas.
It will be a busy month in my personal and professional lives. The meeting of Independent Presidential Candidates and Thanksgiving has caused all of my presentations to be moved up to the week of November 9. I will be working many 16-hour days the next two weeks (except this Tuesday). I will also have Patricia next weekend.
This is a hectic time and I might not be able to post every day. I am letting you know now so you don’t think I returned to the ashram or anything silly like that. Things will return to normal on Thanksgiving week.
For those who look forward to my weekly football picks, I will still do them. The picks for Weeks 10 and 11 will both be posted on November 12. The picks for Thanksgiving week will be posted the Tuesday before Thanksgiving.
I am glad that meetup groups are not waiting for the media to cover the 2012 elections to get motivated. I will be speaking this Tuesday at the Pair-a-Dice Trailer Park. The subject will be caring for seniors.
I am proud of my supporters. They suggested that talk is not enough and they are correct. We will give the first 20 seniors who show up for the meetup group a six-pack of Alpo Prime Cuts and a spork for each can. The Ahmnodt Heare administration will make sure seniors don’t go hungry.
If you want to request Ahmnodt Heare to appear at a rally or to meet fellow supporters, then place a location where you want to meet on the map at the bottom of the page. You can leave a quick note and nobody will see it until I am notified and approve the message.
Soon after announcing that I was going to run for President of the United States, I decided to look for organizations to join to solidify my campaign. I saw something about the Emperors’ Club during a dogpile search. I thought to myself that being a president was like being an emperor, so I thought I should join.
I went to the website and saw a lot of hotties. Now I know why Presidents are heavily involved in foreign affairs! I sent an e-mail and told them who I was and asked about membership. They said that membership was charged by the hour and fees were from $1000 to $5000 per hour.
I never heard of a club that charged membership by an hour and the prices were kind of high, but emperors had that kind of money. I opted for the $5000 membership because I was going to be the equivalent of the Emperor of the United States.
The emperor I met that night was named Chloe. I asked her how long she had been an emperor and she chuckled. I inquired about what is normally done when two emperors meet and she laughed mysteriously. She soon told me that sex is usually involved.
”What if a bunch of emperors are together?” I asked.Chloe told me that I should have done more research on emperors and on the Emperors’ Club. She got up and left. I had spent $5000 for a ten-minute conversation. Was I ever screwed!
Ahmnodt Heare is a fictional character running a real campaign. He is an Independent candidate for President of the United States. His views on solving America’s problems is different than the ideas being offered by any Republican or Democratic candidate.
In the upcoming days, he will give a daily account of his political activities, campaigns, and other behind the scene activities like no other candidate ever has.
The purpose of this blog is to showing the absurdity of Ahmnodt Heare’s platform and show that the two major parties are equally absurd (especially at the federal level.)
If you are fed up with the two-party duopoly, then feel free to write in “Ahmnodt Heare” for the office of your choosing.
On Election Day, tell your fellow Americans, “Ahmnodt Heare!”
Busy Times Ahead
The frequency of my blogging may be limited over the next month. It is a busy month for the campaign as I have the “Orgies for Abstinence” event coming up on Election night (this coming Tuesday). I will be attending the Meeting of Independent Presidential Candidates from the 13th through the 21st in the Bahamas.
It will be a busy month in my personal and professional lives. The meeting of Independent Presidential Candidates and Thanksgiving has caused all of my presentations to be moved up to the week of November 9. I will be working many 16-hour days the next two weeks (except this Tuesday). I will also have Patricia next weekend.
This is a hectic time and I might not be able to post every day. I am letting you know now so you don’t think I returned to the ashram or anything silly like that. Things will return to normal on Thanksgiving week.
For those who look forward to my weekly football picks, I will still do them. The picks for Weeks 10 and 11 will both be posted on November 12. The picks for Thanksgiving week will be posted the Tuesday before Thanksgiving.
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October 30, 2009 Posted by Ahmnodt Heare | Ahmnodt, commentary, satire | abstinence, ashram, candidate, Election Day, meeting, NFL, orgy, Thanksgiving | 2 Comments