Ahmnodt Heare for President

Ahmnodt Heare For America… Ahmnodt Heare For You.

When News was News

I had been hoping there would be a ton of political news happening for me to comment on.  Not only are they not talking much about politics on the network news shows, there hasn’t been much political talk on the political talk news stations.  What have they concired to be news?

  • The Royal Wedding – It seems the news networks never received the memo that the United States declared independence from Britain 235 years ago.  AT least Americans weren’t footed with the tax bill to pay for the wedding they weren’t invited to.
  • Osama bin Laden – US Navy Seals shot and killed a man who died in 2001.
  • Casey Anthony – the story the news stations like to go to when there is political stuff happening that they don’t wish to discuss.
  • Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria Schriver separating – This story is about as relevant as the cat stuck in the tree until the fire department rescued it.

Back in the day, the only thing that was reported in the news was the news (and sports and weather,)  The news usually told stories that were relevant to one’s life.I think Don Mills would agree with me.  Today’s news (especially the Morning and Mid-Day shows) contain such hard-hitting stories as fashion tips and Hollywood gossip.

We need more news happening out of Washington.  The Congresscritters and Obama are there.  I am sure what they are doing is more important than fashion tips or Hollywood gossip.

If you are a news producer, I advise you to head to Capitol Hill and find out what Congress plans to do to us before they get to do it to us.

May 10, 2011 Posted by | commentary, editorial, humor, satire, Washington | , , , , , , | 2 Comments

A Cool Campaigning Tool

I have never realized how far I am behind technology when it comes to communicating with the deceased.  Going to a cemetery or morgue and talking to them used to be enough.  I am sadly mistaken.  Others have taken deceased involvement to a new level.  Former congressional candidate Jim Ogonowski was able to collect signatures to get him on the ballot for Senator in 2008.  The state of Massachusetts recently announced that there are over 100,000 registered dead people on its voting rolls.

All of these techniques are barbaric compared to what a company is able to now.  IntelCenter has produced tapes of Osama bin Laden talking about future attacks against the United States.  Previous tapes include bin Laden condemning a 2008 cartoon ridiculing Islam.  Osama bin Laden died in December 2001.

I hope I can get this technology and use it for my campaign.  It will let everybody know how hard I have been campaigning and it will be a tremendous boost. I will call IntelCenter later and ask how much their device costs.

January 25, 2010 Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, commentary, humor, satire | , , , , , , | Comments Off on A Cool Campaigning Tool

Al-Qaida No. 2 insults Obama in new audio message

via Al-Qaida No. 2 insults Obama in new audio message

This time we know the name of the next number 2 guy that we are going to kill.  He is Ayman al-Zawahri, and he is the latest in line to the fatal job position.

The economy is tough and jobs are scarce, but when I see a job opening for “Al-Qaeda number two guy”, I just skip it and look for a less fatal job position.

I think I know why it’s called the “Number 2” position.
If I am elected President, my first executive order will be to declare Osama bin Laden as the number 2 guy.

November 19, 2008 Posted by | Afghanistan, Ahmnodt, economy, foreign policy, Iraq, satire, War | , , , , , | 3 Comments

   

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