Bedridden

I will be laid up in bed for the next few days while I am recovering from a hamstring injury.  This will prohibit me from making the campaign events I had planned to make over the next few days.  It’s sad because I hadn’t been on the campaign trail for a while and it was yesterday that I was able to put the schedule together.

Below is the events I will not be able to attend this week:

• Tonight – Social Networking Utilization Summit – White Plains, NY – I was supposed to give a speech on how I was able to have several tweets read on television and how having tweets read has increased the number of people following me on Twitter.  I was going to stay afterwards for the seminar on how to trend.  As popular as my campaign is becoming, #ahmnodtheare is not trending anywhere in the United States.  (Though rumor has it that #ahmnodthearesucks trends a couple times a week in Toronto and in Calgary.
• Tomorrow – A Synopsis of Recent Weather Phenomenon – New York, NY – I was invited to speak at Columbia University to speak.  Not on what causes climate change (I have no idea) but on how (and in my speech, when) to fight climate change.
• Thursday – Parents Without Partners – Wayne, NJ – This isn’t a traditional campaign as much as a personal stop.  But telling single moms that I am a single dad who is running for President is an ice-breaker.  It also sounds more impressive than the guy who brags about being the shift manager at Arby’s.
• Friday – Rally in front of the FCC building – Washington, DC.  I wanted to get the word out that my name is being censored when the mainstream media is talking about presidential candidates.  Censorship is wrong (except when I need to cover my hide to better serve Americans)

I am hoping to be up and more than hopping along by Saturday.  The main obstacle is not hurting myself getting out of bed to go to the bathroom (which is how I got hurt in the first place.)