Ahmnodt Heare for President

Ahmnodt Heare For America… Ahmnodt Heare For You.

Wild Card Playoff Predictions

It is that time of year again:  The NFL Playoffs.  This weekend is the Wild-Card round.  Eight teams will fight to the death for the right to lose next weekend in Indianapolis, San Diego, New Orleans, and Minnesota.

I was doing predictions in the beginning of the year.  But between my schedule and not being very good at this, I stopped predicting games in November.  Some people say it’s not very presidential picking games.  This is my way of showing I am in touch of what is going on in America today.

NY Jets (+2.5) at Cincinnati

The Jets have something the Bengals don’t have in a quarterback like Mark Sanchez.  On a cold wintry afternoon/ evening in Cincinnati, the Bengals should be glad.  Take the Bengals, give the points.

Philadelphia (+3.5) at Dallas

This is the game I least want to watch.  The football gods have been cruel to Redskins fans all season, and today won’t be any different.  Take the Cowboys and give the points.

Baltimore (+3.5) at New England

This game will show how much the Patriots miss Tedy Bruschi.  This game will get ugly with Ray Rice running through the Patriots defense like I ran when Pastor Reynolds caught me with her daughter when I was in high school.  Take the Ravens and the points.

Green Bay (-1) at Arizona

All the momentum would suggest to take the Packers, which ends up being the games the Cardinals win.  I went against the Cardinals all season last year and was one play away from going 0-4.  Take the Cardinals and the lousy single point.

Best bet – Cowboys (Because the football gods want to laugh at me one more time.)


January 9, 2010 Posted by | Ahmnodt, commentary, humor | , , , , , , , , , , , | Comments Off on Wild Card Playoff Predictions

A Blot on the Family Tree

It is a sad day for the Heare family.  It is with deep sorrow that I inform you what my father did.  He has been banned from the Northern Virginia Shuffleboard League because he tested positive for “performance-enhancing” drugs.  By performance-enhancing drugs, I don’t mean something like “Viagra.”  If that was the case, at least my mother would be happy.

My father tested positive for anabolic steroids when he was tested following his “record-breaking” performance in the Northern VA Shuffleboard League semi-finals.  He was an average player during the regular season with no outstanding games and no terrible games.  His performance escalated with his best performances during the playoffs and cumulated with his “record-setting” performance in the semi-finals.

He does not plan to appeal the decision and apologized to the other participants and to the league for his poor discretion.  I would like to take a moment to state that I had no prior knowledge that he played shuffleboard.

I will not be campaigning much this weekend as I recover from this ordeal.

August 21, 2009 Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, humor, satire, scandal, senior citizens | , , , , , | 5 Comments

Super Bowl XLIII Prediction

The two weeks between the Conference Championship games and the Super Bowl is the longest two-week period of the year.  And the second week is longer than the first week.  “Media Tuesday” is the annual event where reporters get to ask the stupidest questions they can come up with.  It is an honored Super Bowl tradition.

I like the Cardinals.  I really do.  But they’re not going to win.  The Steelers will win their second Vince Lombardi trophy in four years.  The final score will be 31-20.  Troy Polamalu will be the MVP.

Update:  You can find my Super Bowl XLIV Prediction here:

January 21, 2009 Posted by | Ahmnodt | , , , , , | 1 Comment

AFC Championship Prediction

Baltimore (13-5) at Pittsburgh (13-4) – 6:30PM Eastern (CBS)

There is no conference championship game like games played against division rivals.  These teams know each each other, and as Captain Obvious Dan Dierdorf would say, “These teams really don’t like each other.”  The weather in Pittsburgh in January can’t be too tropical, and both teams love defenses.  It seems these games always end up being high scoring.

Steelers 40 Ravens 34

NFC Championship Prediction

January 13, 2009 Posted by | Ahmnodt, commentary, Uncategorized | , , , , , | 1 Comment

NFC Championship Prediction

If you have been following my predictions in the division and wild-card rounds, you would know by now that I suck at this.  Instead of picking all games on the same day, I will pick one game at a time.

Philadelphia (11-6-1) at Arizona (11-7) – 3:00PM Eastern (FOX)

Who would have thought we would have had a Conference Championship game with neither team winning ten games in the regular season?  The road team has the better record.

Both games have looked impressive in their playoff wins.  This game features two quarterbacks with a ton of playoff experience.  While Arizona has proven that they are a great team, the Eagles are playing with a chip on their shoulder.  I will go with my gut feeling and predict the Eagles will win  a close, hard-fought battle 20-17.

AFC Championship Prediction

January 12, 2009 Posted by | Ahmnodt, commentary, Uncategorized | , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Recapping a Perfect Weekend

I predicted 4 division round playoff games, I got 4 wrong.  Let’s take a look at how I reached perfection:

Ravens at Titans: – The hottest team in the league is going against the team with the best record.  The Titans faltered down the stretch, but they are home and they are rested.  Titans win 17-13.

I stated that the Ravens were the hot team and I went against them.  The Ravens play on while the Titans enjoy the Opry.

Cardinals at Panthers: – This is the one game that could get ugly.  The Cardinals looked good against the Falcons, but they were at home and they were playing against a rookie quarterback and a rookie coach.  Like in nature, the Panthers will devour the Cardinals 41-8.

This game was not natural, but I guessed correctly that it would get ugly.  The Panthers were a bunch of pussies.

Eagles at Giants:  Division games are always tough.  The trendy pick will be to pick the Eagles, but the Giants know what the Eagles are going through, the Giants played three road playoff games last year and will not underestimate the Eagles.  I would not be surprised if this game went into overtime.  Giants win 16-13.

I paid the price for not being trendy.  The Eagles continue the tradition of being the number 6 seed and going to the NFC Championship Game.  The Giants continue the tradition of being the top NFC seed to top-notch skiing clients.

Chargers at Steelers:  Common sense says the Steelers will win.  I still have issues with Norv Turner as a head coach.  Chargers will win this one just to prove me wrong about everything including my views on Global Warming.  Chargers 20 Steelers 13.

Common sense prevailed.  Norv was Norv.  He couldn’t even prove me wrong.

I warned you not to bet the ranch.  But if you must bet the ranch dressing, buy it here.

January 11, 2009 Posted by | Ahmnodt, commentary, satire, Uncategorized | , , , , , , , , | Comments Off on Recapping a Perfect Weekend

NFL Playoff Predictions

Before I make my predictions, I would like to make a brief comment about the playoff seedings.  I think that if the NFL is going to allow a division winner to make a playoffs no matter how bad the team is, then the least they can do is seed all teams by their records.  Indianapolis and Atlanta should not be punished with a low seed just because they are in a same division as a great team that won their respective divisions.  I will comment more after I make my predictions.

NFC Wild Card Games:

Atlanta at Arizona:  This game is more interesting than it should be because the worse team is at home.  The worse team was rewarded for playing in a weak division.  The Falcons were punished for playing Carolina, Tampa Bay, and New Orleans twice and finishing with an overall 11-5 record.  Falcons win this game 38-13.

Philadelphia at Minnesota:  The Vikings lose this game because their biggest home field advantage is the brutally cold Minnesota air.  But since the game is indoors, the advantage is gone.  Eagles win a tough one 20-17.

AFC Wild Card Games:

Baltimore at Miami:  Everybody is afraid of the Miami Dolphins.  I think it is because people confuse Head Coach Tony Sparano with mobster Tony Soprano.  Dolphins win a close one, 17-13.

Indianapolis at San Diego.  This is the game Chargers fans see the coaching capabilities of Norv Turner.  Colts win 41-17.


My playoff plan is different than any any plan currently being used.  I would allow every team with a winning record to make the playoffs.  Since the number of teams with winning records varies from year to year, so would the number of teams making the playoffs.  My plan would have teams like the Bears, Patriots, and Cowboys in the playoffs this year while the Chargers and the Cardinals would stay home.  Winning the division wouldn’t mean anything, but the division format would stay for scheduling reasons.

With the 2008 standings, 7 AFC and 8 NFC teams would make the playoffs.  in the AFC, only Tennessee would get a bye.  The NFC would not have anybody with a bye.  Below would be my matchups for the first round:


1)Tennessee – Bye

2)Pittsburgh – vs. 7) NY Jets

3)Indianapolis – vs. 6)New England

4)Baltimore (They would have won the tie breaker) vs. 5)Miami

The lower number seeds are home.  The Titans would play the highest number seed in the second round and the two other winners would play at the team with the lower seed number.

December 29, 2008 Posted by | commentary, editorial | , , , , , , , , , , | 7 Comments


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