Another Politician Steals My Ideas

I had this as part of my 2008 platform:

”War on Poverty” can be solved by making poverty a crime. I would throw all the poor people in jail.

If you click my link, you will see that I have what I think is a better plan.  People told me that my original plan was too cruel and inhumane.  They said that I needed a more humane method with dealing with the impoverished.  After much deliberation, I grudgingly changed my position to one people like more.

What has gotten my boat is that these same people who told me to change my position have taken my original position and made it part of their platform.  New York Republican Gubernatorial candidate Carl Paladino has taken my old campaign position and is now trying to sell it as his own.

This is the latest incident of “mainstream” politicians copying me.  I ask you this:  Do you want to vote for a follower pretending to be a leader or do you want to vote for a leader?  I haven’t followed anybody (besides the hottie wearing tight leather pants).  I am a leader and I have been ready to lead.

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Why Equality is a Myth

A = B and B = A.  When people are A, they want to equal B.  But when people are B, they don’t want to equal A.  The reality is that people want to be equal in some aspects, but not in other aspects.  Because of this mindset, equality is a myth.

People who don’t have rights want the same rights as people who do have rights.  People who aren’t allowed to vote want to vote like people who are allowed to vote.  Those who can’t practice religion want to practice religion like those who who can.  People who aren’t allowed to download pornography desire to download risqué pictures like those who are allowed.

However, people who don’t have responsibilities don’t want the same responsibilities as those who do.  The poor want to be rich, but wouldn’t want to pay the same taxes as the rich.  Entry-level employees want the same benefits as those in upper management, but don’t want to put in the hours or deal with the headaches as their bosses.

If you’re going to fight for equality. fight for total equality.  A can’t equal B if B doesn’t equal A.  if you want to be like rich people, fight for your right to pay more taxes.  If you want more hours, fight for your right to make your job thankless.  Otherwise, you are not fighting for true equality and the “equality” you are fighting for becomes a myth.

A Change of Heart

After much deliberation, I have decided to change a position on something currently on my platform.  My new position on the “War on Poverty” is listed below:

"War on Poverty" can be solved by giving poor people $30/month and
sending them to Africa once a month for food shopping.  A family of
four in Africa can eat for $.70/day.  They would still have $8.30 for
beer.

Join WALNUT!

There are many groups whose function is to help the poor with things like food, shelter, and voting.  I volunteer for a group called WALNUT (We Americans Lending Naturally Underused Talents).  WALNUT helps people with limited potential reach their potential.

WALNUT helps people with their shopping budget.  We show them the cost-saving measures of Ramen Noodles, coupons, and using other people’s money.  WALNUT helps the homeless’s shelter needs by showing them what to look for in a cardboard box.  WALNUT helps taking the pressure of voting off of people by filling out an absentee ballot on their behalf.  The only thing they have to do is sign the ballot.

I strongly urge you join a WALNUT near you.  If you can’t find a WALNUT near you, you can start your own chapter.

What is the fastest way to bail out old people who are struggling?

I think the fastest way to help these people (and all Americans) is to throw all the poor people in jail.  The poor would have a roof over their heads and food three times a day.  Many jails include free cable.

For seniors with some money, I will allow seniors to buy premium dog food at generic food prices.

Helping the Poor

I would help the poor by throwing them in jail. Once in jail, they would be fed and have a place to sleep at night.