Ahmnodt Heare for President

Ahmnodt Heare For America… Ahmnodt Heare For You.

Drug Policy

I haven’t fully explain my policy on illicit drugs.  It was based on the flaw I found on the “Just Say No” policy founded by Nancy Reagan.  The flaw is that they can’t say “No.”

My policy is different because it takes into consideration that people are curious and people want to feel better during tough economic times.  This is why I have stuck with my “Just say, ‘O.K. but just this once'” policy.  Not only does it allow people to fill their curiosity, but it also allows an out before they get addicted.

I don’t know why the “War on Drugs” issue wasn’t talked about more.  Instead of putting drug users into overcrowded prisons, I would make them work for the farms who have lost labor because the help moved back to Mexico.

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February 20, 2009 Posted by | Ahmnodt, commentary, economy, issues, satire | , , , , , | 9 Comments

How I Would Relieve Overcrowding Prisons

California recently was ordered to release over 10,000 prisoners because their prisons are overcrowded.  Some say we should build more prisons while others say we should have fewer laws.  I have a few additional suggestions:

  1. Waist limit of 34 inches:  By getting prisoners to lose weight and get slender, there will be more room to move around.  Overweight prisoners will go to a boot camp to shed inches before being allowed to a regular prison.
  2. Get rid of TVs and Weights:  They simply take up too much room and do little to rehabilitate prisoners.
  3. Bunk beds:  Prison cells will be equipped with three-high bunk beds.  This will create more room.
  4. Replace toilets with urinals:   This will save space.  Prisoners’ diets will be liquid, so solid excretion will no longer be a problem.
  5. Make prison life so miserable that they will never want to come back.  This will stop the influx of repeat offenders.

With just a little ingenuity, prisons can be made less crowded without hitting taxpayers with the cost of extra prisons and overhauling the entire penal code.

February 10, 2009 Posted by | commentary, debt, editorial, issues, legislation, satire | , , , , | 5 Comments

   

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