Ahmnodt Heare for President

Ahmnodt Heare For America… Ahmnodt Heare For You.

2012 in Review – March

One would assume since most of the month was spent between vacation and illness, that this would be a non-productive month with no major accomplishments.  I managed to get a lot done in the few days I got to do stuff.

I became the first (and only) candidate in 2012 to devise a plan to prevent natural disasters.  Others have taken on the fight against the Cinemafia.  Then there was this cute little piece on why I would be a better candidate than any corporate cartoon character.  The high prices at supermarkets seemed to have affected me more than other candidates.

I somehow managed to run my business while I was hospitalized.  Further complications arose when my parents decided to get a separation and both planned a surprise visit to my place on the same day.  I lost the one delegate I had won for the Republican National Convention due to Republicans cheating a technicality.

March was a few moral victories sandwiching a physical defeat.  It sounds nice, but moral victories would not catapult me to the White House.

December 23, 2012 Posted by | Ahmnodt, issues, satire | , , , | 1 Comment

Clint Eastwood’s Real Endorsement

Clint Eastwood’s subliminal endorsement goes through a clueless mainstream media ans the Republican Party Convention.

Moments before Mitt Romney formally accepted the Republican Party’s nomination for President, Clint Eastwood gave a speech.  Mr. Eastwood had a little chat with an empty chair.  People automatically assumed that chair was a bashing of President Obama.  While he did talk about Obama’s absence in policy, it was not why the chair was there.  The empty chair was a symbolic endorsement for I’m Not Here Ahmnodt Heare.  He couldn’t formally endorse me for President, especially at a party convention for which party I am not a member of.  I am an independent and not a member of any party.  I tend to be a wallflower at parties, especially at parties without booze.

Clint Eastwood was once the mayor of Carmel, California.  He was officially a Republican, but many in the party thought he was too independent for mainstream Republicanism.  He had heard more than his share of criticism over the years.  He didn’t address the critics at the time because he had a town to manage.  But Clint Eastwood never forgets.  Like a ninja in the dark, he patiently waits his chance to pounce and POW!

I like to thank Mr. Eastwood for his endorsement.  My only regret is that more people didn’t pick up on the symbolism.

September 4, 2012 Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, commentary, endorsement, humor, politics, Republicans, satire | , , , , , | 5 Comments

Hey, I Tried

I was hoping I could watch the Republican and Democratic Conventions without falling asleep.  There was hope the Republican convention could actually get exciting with Ron Paul’s delegates causing some kind of ruckus.  I heard through the grapevine that they did cause some commotion, but the media brushed it aside.

Watching the opening of today’s activities was not like watching paint dry.  It was more like listening to paint dry.  I do not know if RNC Chair Reince Priebus was drunk or is uncomfortable speaking in front of people, but that boy didn’t look right today.

I was considering joining a political party but thought better of it.  But neither party has many good ideas and it shows.  The best thing about being an Independent is that I can take the 2% of the Republican ideas that are good and the 2% of the Democratic ideas that are good and combine them with the 70% of the Libertarian, Reform, Green, Constitution, and The Rent is Too Damned High parties as well as the ideas I have kicked up over the years.

While there will never be a party convention for independents, that gives me more time to spend with real Americans while the other candidates hang out with party big-wigs with personalities of a wet dirty mop.  Time to clean the mop and ring it out.

Watching a party convention is like watching a telethon.  It’s all about a disease for which there is no cure and they want your money.  I don’t want your money.  It’s hard to like someone who does want your money.  Even a political novice like myself knows that an independent cannot get votes if nobody likes him (or her).  That’s why i try to be likable.

August 28, 2012 Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, commentary, editorial, humor, politics, Republicans, satire | , , , , , , , | 1 Comment


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