King Ahmnodt I

I have run into some difficulty in my latest attempt to run for President.  While people have shown overwhelming enthusiasm for my platform, there hasn’t been enough people.  While I continue to lead Presidential candidates in the quality of support, it hasn’t turned to the quantity of support (votes).

Another problem I am having is that 2016 is a long time away (By 2016, I really mean January 20, 2017 – the day I would take office).  It’s a short time to get a quality campaign capable of winning a nationwide election without spending a dime.  It’s an eternity for Obama to mess up things more than they already more and making it impossible for anybody (even me) to clean up all of his messes in only four years.

A true leader takes matters into his own hands.  This is why I have declared myself “King of the United States of America”.  I am not going to be a power-hungry king.  The only immediate action I am taking as King is to have Canadian Spy Justin Bieber deported to Canada where he belongs.

Some of you might remember that I have been a harsh critic of royalty in recent years.  Below is a video of a tweet I had tweeted that was read on WPIX in New York:

It seems that America is hungry for a King.  The news and social networks have been talking about nothing but the birth of a royal baby all day.  This royal baby born today isn’t even American royalty.  We need American royalty to help fix this country.  I am honored to have selected myself to be the first American King.

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