Ahmnodt Heare for President

Ahmnodt Heare For America… Ahmnodt Heare For You.

Will They Ever Quit?

The Cinemafia knows I have been going after them and now they are retaliating.  They have infiltrated Saguache County, Colorado (The county which I received the most votes for President in 2008.)  There was monkey business with the election results there in the 2010 elections.

President Obama and the Democrats are doing everything to do to make sure they stay in power.  Saguache County is a heavy Democratic county.  It was one of the few heavily-Democratic counties that did not vote for President Obama in 2008.  (Most of those others went for John McCain, Saguache County went to me.)

I have proven previously that President Obama is Cinemafioso.   Although the County Clerk has been cleared of any wrongdoing, there is still that air of doubt.  All I have to do is prove the connection between the Obama administration and the Saguache County Board of Elections.

There is a debate I wasn’t invited to tonight on FoxNews.  I will be tweeting my replies to the questions and offer commentary on Twitter.  If you have any questions on my replies or commentaries or you want to be asked something not being discussed, then feel free to tweet your question with the #askahmnodt hashtag and I will answer it as soon as I can.

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January 16, 2012 Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, cinemafia, commentary, election, humor, Obama, politics, satire, scandal | , , , , | Comments Off on Will They Ever Quit?

Kicking it Up a Notch

Former House Speaker Newt Gingrich will announce his intentions for running for President sometime next week.  The rest of the year will be filled with other presidential hopefuls.  I see this as two things:  That my days of running unopposed are numbered and that I had a 20-month head start and that might be too overwhelming for my competitors.

I have already planned my vacation from August 14-29.  It will include my second annual trip to Blanca Fest  and Saguache County, Colorado. I will drive to Colorado this year as this will allow me time to campaign during the drive from New Jersey.  I’ll be stopping in Cleveland, Chicago, Des Moines, Grand Rapids Nebraska, and Baltimore.  The return trip will include Kansas City, St. Louis, Indianapolis, Akron, and Las Vegas.

What the next presidents owes to the American people (whether it’s me, media Goddess Sarah Palin, or some other schmuck:

  • A health care plan that is affordable for the American people that will not bankrupt the government.
  • Jobs that pay well enough to afford the essentials:  Food, shelter, water, clothing, and entertainment.
  • An education system that allows people to learn how bad government is.
  • Replacing “Presidents’ Day” with Vanna White’s Birthday (February 18) as a national holiday.

There are 28 months until the 2012 General Election.  Together we can make this work and elect a working-class American as President of the United States.  (I mean me).

July 13, 2010 Posted by | campaign, commentary, economy, education, health care, humor, satire | , , , , | 2 Comments

2009 in Review (Part 3)

Today I will review the important things I have learned from July through September 2009. In July I learned that people were paying attention to what I had to say about the Cinemafia.  Unfortunately I learned in August that more had to be done, even on my part.  I also learned not to plan an excursion just before a cross-country walk-a-thon for Affordable Entertainment Awareness.

September was brutal.  I learned some of the pitfalls of being a parent and political event planning doesn’t always draw the crowds one would expect.

I have learned much about peaks and valleys.  For every Saguache County, there’s a place where nobody has heard of me or would rather vote for anybody else than vote for me.

December 26, 2009 Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, commentary, humor, issues, politics, satire | , , , , , | Comments Off on 2009 in Review (Part 3)

Busy Busy Busy

It’s odd that I would find myself busier during vacation than I am usually during the year.  It started early yesterday morning when I went to a local doctor to get a walking boot for the cast on my ankle.  I no longer have to use crutches, but I am still getting around slower than I would like.  I am currently looking for an inline skate I can use on the boot.

I went to the local restaurant for breakfast.  Word got around town that I am here for vacation.  In most parts of the country, I could get around relatively anonyomusly.  In Saguache County, I am as popular as rock star Ajay Bhatt.  The owner of the restaurant showed me the new lunch and dinner menus they have been using the last week.  On the lower left hand corner of the menu is Grandma Oudda’s recipes.

After breakfast, a couple of locals took me on a tour of Saguache County.  The first stop was the town of Center.  The middle of town was a movie theather that closed last year when the citizens of Center decided to fight the Cinemafia by boycotting the theater.  The touching moment came when I found out that people were in the process of buying the theather and making it into the Ahmnodt Heare Community Center.

We were soon off to Crestone.  One of the things you notice immediately about Crestone is that many religions have house of worship here.  There are almost as many religions here as residents of Crestone.  We made a quick stop to Moffat.  there isn’t much to Moffat now, but the town almost became the state capital of Colorado.  (It lost a close election to Denver.)

The final stop was a small ghost-town like village of Bonanza.  Fourteen people live here, but I didn’t get to meet any of them.  The people I was with told me I was probably better off not meeting them because most of them voted for McCain.  I told them that that didn’t matter to me and that I forgive them for their error in judgement.

We headed back to Saguache.  I was having a hard time breathing.  I don’t know if it was because of the elevation (most of the county is over 14,000 feet above sea level) or if it was from the smoke in the air.  I understand that the smoke came from the Los Angeles area, but not because Manny Ramirez is hot.

The day ended with dinner at the restaurant.  I got to try their Strawberry Stroganoff.  It was very good.  It was the first time I had Strawberry Stroganoff  that wasn’t made by a member of my family.

September 3, 2009 Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, humor, satire | , , , , , , , | Comments Off on Busy Busy Busy

Vacation Planning Snafus

I am leaving tomorrow for my vacation to Colorado.  I am planning to spend a week in Saguache County and attend BlancaFest in Fort Garland in neighboring Costilla County.  I have encountered a couple of snafus:

  • There are no buses going to Fort Garland or to Saguache from Denver.  I’ll have to take a bus from Denver to Colorado Springs and spend tomorrow night in Colorado Springs.
  • The only bus from Colorado Springs to Fort Garland leaves Friday Morning.
  • There are no rental car places in either Fort Garland or in Saguache.
  • There are no nudie bars in Fort Garland or Saguache.
  • The rental car place I checked out in Colorado Springs was charging $300/week plus $.15/mile (It is 127 miles from Colorado Springs to Fort Garland and another 78 miles from Fort Garland to Saguache.
  • The only bus that leaves Fort Garland to Colorado Springs leaves Sunday.

I have invested too much in this vacation to cancel it.  I will find a way to get where I have to be.  Next time, I will make sure that either Greyhound or Amtrak goes through the towns I want to visit before visiting.

If you are planning to attend Blanca Fest, I need a ride to Saguache.  I will also need a ride from Saguache to Colorado Springs on Friday morning.

See you at Blanca Fest!

August 26, 2009 Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, humor | , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Vacation Planning

I will be taking my first vacation since I first started running for President soon.  I will be going to Blanca Fest in Fort Garland, CO and will be spending the rest of my vacation in Saguache County.  Although there is not much to do Saguache County, I feel obligated to show my graditude to the fine people of Saguache County for electing me for their president over both Barack Obama and John McCain.

I do not know why I didn’t show my appreciation sooner.  I owe the fine people another apology as well.  I have found out that I have been pronouncing the name of their county incorrectly on my radio show.  I was pronouncing it as a Spanish word (Sah-Goo-Ah-chay).  The correct pronounciation is (Saw-WATCH) as it is an Ute Indian word meaning, “Water at Blue Earth”.

I will be staying at the Hillside Hotel in Saguache.  I will leave early that Saturday for the Blanca Fest.  For those not familiar with the Blanca Fest, it is a day of tours, a Chuck Wagon styled dinner, and bluegrass music.  I want to volunteer with the Chuck Wagon dinner because I want to make sure that senior citizens are getting the real Chuck Wagon and not the generic.

August 15, 2009 Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, commentary, endorsement, Obama, satire, senior citizens | , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Thanks to “Alien Ramone”

Special thanks are in order for “Alien Ramone” on SodaHead.  Not only did Alien remind people on SodaHead that I did indeed win Saguache County in the 2008 election, but also the possibility that Saguache County did not get as much stimilus money as other counties because the fine citizens there chose me over President Obama for President.

If we keep up the effort, then we can shock Washington and win the White House in 2012.  I am feeling good about this, but there is so much more we have to do.

July 30, 2009 Posted by | Ahmnodt, Bailout, commentary, election, humor, Obama, politics, satire, write-in | , , , , , | Comments Off on Thanks to “Alien Ramone”

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