I Should Have Ran for Congress
This has been a busy week thus far. It’s 8:30PM and I just finished working for the day after starting at 7:00AM all week. This is the first day this week I was able to finish before 10:00PM. I am working more this week because I plan on taking two weeks off for vacation and campaigning starting Friday night.
Two weeks is a lot of time to be away from work, especially when you run your own business. But the time off I will be taking is minuscule compared to what Congress takes off every year. They are currently on a five-week vacation and won’t return to work until after Labor Day. They also get a nice long vacation for Christmas/New Year’s and for Easter. I think they’re trying to take off for Spring Break next year. We can spend a week hangin’ with the homies John Boehner and Harry Reid.
The last time I had five weeks off was between my sophomore and junior years of high school. I worked during my summer vacations after that: First as a paperboy during after my junior year then as a pool boy after my senior year. The pool boy job was interesting as I spent little time cleaning the pool for the Johnson’s when Mr. Johnson was working. I spent more time picking up things around the pool under Mrs. Johnson’s constant supervision. She always looked thirsty, and I told her she should be inside and cool off. but she’d stay outside.
If I somehow lose the presidential election this November (90 days remaining), I might run for Congress in 2014. I’ll make more money and work fewer hours. It will be a win-win situation. The best part is that I can run for President in 2016.
New Experiment
Below is the list for the primaries and caucuses after today’s in South Carolina:
January 31, 2012 | Florida (primary) |
February 4, 2012 | Nevada (caucus) |
February 4–11, 2012 | Maine (caucus) |
February 7, 2012 | Colorado (caucus) Minnesota (caucus) Missouri (primary) |
February 28, 2012 | Arizona (primary) Michigan (primary) |
March 3, 2012 | Washington (caucus) |
March 6, 2012 (Super Tuesday) |
Alaska (caucus) Georgia (primary) Idaho (caucus) Massachusetts (primary) North Dakota (caucus) Ohio (primary) Oklahoma (primary) Tennessee (primary) Vermont (primary) Virginia (primary) |
March 6-10, 2012 | Wyoming (caucus) |
March 10, 2012 | Kansas (caucus) U.S. Virgin Islands (caucus) |
March 13, 2012 | Alabama (primary) Hawaii (caucus) Mississippi (primary) |
March 17, 2012 | Missouri (GOP caucus) |
March 18, 2012 | Puerto Rico (primary) |
March 20, 2012 | Illinois (primary) |
March 24, 2012 | Louisiana (primary) |
April 3, 2012 | District of Columbia (primary) Maryland (primary) Wisconsin (primary) Texas (primary) |
April 24, 2012 | Connecticut (primary) Delaware (primary) New York (primary) Pennsylvania (primary) Rhode Island (primary) |
May 8, 2012 | Indiana (primary) North Carolina (primary) West Virginia (primary) |
May 15, 2012 | Nebraska (primary) Oregon (primary) |
May 22, 2012 | Arkansas (primary) Kentucky (primary) |
June 5, 2012 | California (primary) Montana (primary) New Jersey (primary) New Mexico (primary) South Dakota (primary) |
June 26, 2012 | Utah (primary) |
I am not sure if my plan will work in caucuses, but my plan will in primaries and it will for the general election. This innovative plan will be taught in Political Science courses for years to come. Take a vacation anywhere in the United States on Election Day week! Don’t vote on Election Day! You have better things to do with your time than spending hours on line on Election Day only to be stuck behind people who don’t know how to fill out a ballot.
There are a few things you need to do before you go on vacation:
- Go to the county (parish in Louisiana) (BOEE in Washington DC) Board of Elections and pick up an absentee ballot.
- Fill in the ballot including “Ahmnodt Heare” (without quotes) under “President of the United States” . Click the link if you need a way to remember how to spell my name. And “Albee Thayer” for Vice-President. Feel free to choose who you want for other offices on your ballot. Make a photocopy for your records.
- Mail the ballot (Original, not photocopy!) by October 23. (Two weeks before the primary or caucus in your state for primaries and caucuses). This will allow plenty of time to make sure your ballot is received by Election Day.
This will leave you all Election Day to do whatever you want. You can even campaign for me the entire time the polls are opened without having to worry about voting.
Enjoy your vacation and thank you for your support!
Back at It
I’ll be returning to the swing of things tomorrow. The vacation was both relaxing and healing. I even found time to campaign in Matamoras, PA and New Paltz, NY. I have been to New Paltz before. The locals said “Oh no this guy again!” “Welcome back!” People are pleasantly surprised that a presidential candidate is offering solutions that don’t screw the people. People smile when they heard me. In fact, if my hearing was better, I could have sworn they enjoyed what I had to say so much, their joy was a laughter.
Vacation was relaxing. My hamstring feels much better. I find fishing more relaxing when I don;t put anything on the hook. I don’t have to fight the fish as I am reeling it in because fish won’t bite a bare hook. There are no worries about the fish was big enough to keep or if I had to bring it back. And because I didn;t have any fish biting, I was able to drink the six-pack uninterrupted.
There wasn’t much to do Friday night in the town I was staying in, so I didn’t do anything. There wasn’t much to do Saturday afternoon either so I worked on my tan. Although I was laying down the entire time, I worked on my tan too hard and got burnt.
The town was happening Saturday night. First there was the spaghetti dinner at the volunteer fire house. It seemed like the entire town was there. My brain froze because I had no plans for fire houses. (I still don’t, but I am working on it. This is important to me because the spaghetti dinner wasn’t like mama used to make.)
I asked the gentleman I was eating next to what people in town do on a Saturday night. He said most people just stay home but some people hang out at the gas station. We went to the gas station. It was one of those gas stations with a convenience store. There wasn’t much to do there but shoot the breeze. A man named Dave seemed to shoot the breeze with an Uzi. He had some stories to tell about the time he ran for governor in 2006. He told me a lot that I could learn if I could remember. There was a lot of information so I bought a notebook and a pack of pens. I wrote everything down, but left the notebook at the store. The notebook was gone when I came back the following morning.
Sunday was a good day. I went to a local church near where I was staying. The church had a pot luck lunch after service. They had spaghetti (I think it was leftovers from the firehouse, but I wasn’t sure.) I was about to leave when a woman brought out a pot of Strawberry Stroganoff. Not just any Strawberry Stroganoff, Grandma Oudda’s recipe. I asked her where she got the recipe. She said she got it from this blog. I would like to thank Janet or Debbie (I forgot her name) for reading this blog and for making my weekend.
Back On the Air
For the first time in almost a month, I will be on the air. Since it has been a long time since I took to the airwaves and there will be much to discuss, I will be on for an hour. I will not be using the chat that BlogTalk Radio uses as it uses too much of my computer’s resources and people have to be a member in order to chat. The chat will be hosted on Facebook on my page.
Tonight’s show topics include the “Ground Zero Mosque”, New York Primary results, my vacation, and whatever you wish to discuss.
The radio show if you just want to listen is here. The phoneline for the show is 1-(347)-945-7487.
Showtime is 11:00PM Eastern / 8PM Pacific.
Mosquerade
I will be weighing in the “Ground Zero Mosque” as well as other recent events as my radio show returns next Tuesday at 11:00PM Eastern. (9:00PM Mountain)
The show will include my take on President Obama’s recent Address to the Nation and why I had no problem with him going on vacation.
Off to a Bad Start
This working / medical testing / campaigning / vacation trip has gone off to a bad start. I had arrived at my destination and finished unpacking when I realized I had forgotten my phone. (I did remember my charger this time.) I also forgot my calendar of what I was supposed to do while I am here (and when.) I know about the parade tomorrow afternoon, but there is currently a 70% chance of rain and I am not sure if this is a “rain-or-shine” parade or a “Rain Date next Sunday” parade.
I also forgot my food and medication. There is nothing special about my food, but I like to plan meals for days at a time. Portion control plays a key part in my weight maintenance program. I have already gone overboard by eating a large pizza pie and a calzone for lunch. I’ll be heading out for an “All-you-can-eat” buffet for dinner tonight.
The weird thing is I have been watching more news than I normally have. The more news I watch, the less I know what is going on in the political world. The only thing I got from politics this week is that Rick Santorum said that something was “Bull****”. I wasn’t sure what came after the “Bull” because the news networks kept bleeping it out.
With less news watching and more life doing, I should soon regain my pulse on what is happening in the political world. Yay!
Rate this:
Share this!
Like this:
March 31, 2012 Posted by Ahmnodt Heare | Ahmnodt, campaign, commentary, humor, politics, satire | bullshit, calzone, censorship, food, forgetting, medication, news, phone, vacation, working | 4 Comments