Ahmnodt Heare for President

Ahmnodt Heare For America… Ahmnodt Heare For You.

2012 in review

The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2012 annual report for this blog.

Here’s an excerpt:

4,329 films were submitted to the 2012 Cannes Film Festival. This blog had 20,000 views in 2012. If each view were a film, this blog would power 5 Film Festivals

Click here to see the complete report.

January 5, 2013 Posted by | Ahmnodt | , , | Comments Off on 2012 in review

2012 in Review – April

April started out with the joke on me and ended up being a joke.  I was hospitalized and was unable to partake in the “Orgies for Abstinence”.  I was invited to debate other third party candidates, but I did not receive the invitation until the night before the debate.  Since the debate was in Los Angeles, I was unable to attend.

The month found me defending stay-at-home moms and bashing the Cinemafia be celebrating the 100th anniversary of the Titanic sinking and over 1000 people dying.  The “Ahmnodt Heare Meme” was introduced.  The campaign went into attack mode with aggressively mentioning my campaign on blogs supporting Barack Obama, Mitt Romney, Vermin Supreme, and Justin Bieber.

The attack mode was short-lived as some of my supporters complained of getting spammed with Justin Bieber videos and robo-calls from Obama’s and Romney’s campaigns as well as one supporter receiving repeated calls from a candidate running for Dog Catcher.

April showed so much promise in the beginning, but it ended up being a big April Fool’s joke.

December 23, 2012 Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, debate, humor, Obama, politics, Romney, satire | , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

2012 (You Heard It Here First)

2012 will be a worse year than 2011 for many people.  It can be a great year for you if you have a little insight.  I shall try my best to provide that impact.  I know who will win the general election in 2012, but will not post it because I still want you to go vote (for me) on Election Day.

Unemployment will rise again in 2012.  Now is a good time to start planning a self-proprietorship.  I am the only candidate with a viable jobs program, but even my plan will take some time before the unemployed will reap the benefits of having a job.

Crime will increase.  This is not because we are becoming bad people, but because almost everything will be a crime.  In fact, you no longer have to be charged with a crime to be detained.  You could someday be arrested for reading this blog.  (Don’t worry, I will pardon you for reading this blog once I take office.)

Super Bowl XLVI – If you ignore my predictions throughout the year on my other blog as well as the 2011 season predictions, then you are for the most part better off.  I will stand by my prediction of a Detroit Lions – Baltimore Ravens Super Bowl.

More evidence will surface of the claims I have made against the Cinemafia and Canadian spy Justin Bieber.  The campaign teams of the candidates for president will scour through this blog for ideas to boost their campaign chances.  (And I will expose them for the copycats that they are.)

This has nothing to do with predictions, but I need a place to say this.  Gooogling “Ahmnodt” isn’t nearly as offensive as Googling “Santorum.” That, and I am less offensive than him as well.

Have a happy, safe, prosperous, (insert perky adjective here) New Year!

January 4, 2012 Posted by | commentary, editorial, election, humor, politics, satire | , , , , , , , , | Comments Off on 2012 (You Heard It Here First)

Why Winning an Election is Difficult

It seems like everybody wants to be President of the United States.  Rumor has it that Barack Obama will run for re-election.  The Republicans will run everybody from Mitt Romney and Sarah Palin to Mike Huckabee and maybe Mike Pence.  There are other Independents who want to run.

Here is Anthony Tubbs:

Hugh Jidette

Dick Driben

Ahmnodt Heare

The last one is me, but my video is the only one that shows what to look for in a Presidential candidate.

There will be hundreds, if not thousands who will try to win the 2012 Presidential election.  Many will ask you to donate money for their campaign.  I will not.  I won’t ask for money for two reasons:

1)  I can’t be bought and the ones who can be bought end up doing things other than what you wanted them to do.  There is no money-back-guarantee for a defective politician.

2) I am a fiscal conservative.  It will be hard for me to run up a debt if I don’t spend any money.  And if I don’t spend money, there is no point in asking you to donate.  All I ask is that you understand when my policy is that all Americans give 100% of their income in taxes, it is only because every Friday, you will be refunded what the government  doesn’t use for the week.  And the government will only to be spend money it has.

3) While other candidates are spending time on raising money, I will have more time to talk to the American people and to plan a strategy to combat America’s ever-increasing texting addition.

You may be tempted to search for other candidates, but my platform has an outline of what I will do as President as well as details of the things I will be doing.  I have more blog entries than most candidates do tweets.  The thing about tweets is that they give no details.  Blog entries give details.  If you check my archives, you will see I have written almost 1200 entries all by myself.  I don’t have interns, paid staff, or supporters blogging on my behalf.  So when you see a blogpost written by me, you know it’s authentic.

Please keep everything I have told you in mind when searching for a candidate.  Then come back here.  You will see the differences.

November 12, 2010 Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, commentary, editorial, election, humor, issues, politics, satire | , , | 4 Comments

Ahmnodt Mentioned on Larry King

Larry King and his guest former Alaska governor Sarah Palin discuss what the biggest threat to Sarah Palin’s campaign will be in 2012.  She then starts bad-mouthing me.  Larry King saves the day by saying he supports my campaign!

March 18, 2010 Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, election, humor, issues | , , , , , | 3 Comments

Special Announcement

I am officially announcing my intention to run for President of the United States in 2012.  Whether it will be an election campaign or a re-election campaign will be determined on Election Day. 

I have not heard from my vice presidential candidate, E.D. Yot in over a month.  I will be looking for a replacement if he does not contact me soon.  If you are interested in becoming vice-president, want to help the campaign, contact me, or enjoy a romantic rendezvous, e-mail me at ahmnodtheare@politician.com.

September 11, 2008 Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, election | , , , | Comments Off on Special Announcement