The Ahmnodt Heare for President campaign is suspended until further notice. More information will be given out in a speech he will be giving this weekend.
The more I hear about the Affordable Health Care Plan, the more unaffordable it is becoming. It seems to be the old switcheroo with health care becoming affordable by making health insurance more expensive.
I have written extensively on health care in the past. I was mocked by many by my mandating “An Apple a Day” for every American. Before you resume mocking me, let me point out that a whole year of mandated apples costs less than one month of mandated ObamaCare insurance.
The biggest difference between my plan and other plans is that the other plans only take effect once you fall ill. My plan makes sure you don’t get ill and that you have more time for productive things like work and playing Words with Friends on Facebook.
I will be answering questions that you have about my health care policies Saturday Night at 11:00PM EDT on Blogtalk Radio. Other topics include my new campaign strategies and highlights from my campaign stop in Rehoboth Beach, DE. I’ll look forward to hearing from you.
I haven’t given a campaign speech in a few months. The best thing to prepare for something is to practice what you want to do until it is done correctly.
It was a beautiful day for a trip to the park. I went to an area where nobody was around and started campaigning to a squirrel. My confidence became shaken when the squirrel ran off and ran into traffic. Fortunately, the squirrel was able to cross the street unscathed. On the southern section of the park was a statue of a guy who looked like Cosmo Kramer, (It was supposed to be a Civil War hero, but he looked more like Michael Richards than someone who led an army.) The statue stayed for my entire speech.
I went to a local bar and watched the news whilst nursing a root beer. A young patron in his early 20′s asked me how I felt about the designated hitter rule. I said I was against it and would abolish it if I was elected President. He also hates the DH rule, but wanted to ask me why I was against it. My reason goes back to my days in Little League. I was a pitcher and wanted to bat. The coach said that pitchers weren’t allowed to hit in the league and that the other team’s pitcher wasn’t allowed to bat. Everybody else who played in the field was allowed to hit, why not me? Six runs later, my pitching was done for the day. Not being allowed to bat affected my pitching to the point that I did not want to pitch any more.. I didn’t get to play in the field too often because all of the other positions were filled.
He was so impressed with my story that he invited me over to his house on Sunday to watch football with him and his father. His father likes the DH, but he thinks that I made a strong argument to get rid of it. He wants to join my campaign though he does not the President should not have the power whether or not there should be a designated hitter in baseball. He makes a good point, but Baseball Commissioner Bud Selig irks me and it seems like he is trying to shove the DH down the throats of baseballs everywhere. This has to stop somehow, even if it means occasionally doing more than I should.
After six months of an endless array of delays, I am finally back on track and I can finally resume campaigning (I think). I have finally settled into my home in Delaware and can get back to whatever it is I do.
My first campaign stop is next Monday in Georgetown, Delaware. My campaign manager is currently looking at a good place to campaign. It shouldn’t be too hard because it is a small town. But the way this year has gone, the only sure thing is that there is no sure thing.
I have received some harsh criticism for my comments about how I would have handled the government shutdown. Contrary to rumors, i did not lock my parents in the closet all night. I let them out in time to watch the 11:00 news. Don’t worry though. When we go through this again in three months, I will continue to say I would do a better job. If I didn’t think I could do a better job, then there would be no point in running for President.
Election Day is less than a month away. I hadn’t given it much thought because I moved within a month of Election Day and am ineligible to vote. I’m not running for office this year, so there isn’t this “last-minute” campaigning that I usually do when after four years of campaigning I am still polling in the single digits. (By “single-digits”, I mean single-digits of votes and not percentage of votes.)
For those who are new to the campaign, “Orgies for Abstinence” is a movement I started in 2009. This event takes place twice a year. The first one occurs the Friday after Easter. This allows people who swore off abstinence for Lent to get back to their ways. The second happens on Election Night. This allows Americans feel what is like being a politician feels towards the people. “Orgies for Abstinence” is just like fighting for peace. Since politicians love the latter, it should make sense that they would like the former.
I haven’t planned an “Orgies for Abstinence” and it is unlikely that I will be able to plan one with the awesomeness that people expect from my Orgies for Abstinence campaigns. I do plan on partaking on the festivities providing there is one happening on the Delmarva peninsula. There is too much happening in my personal life (Taking care of my parents, looking for a business niche to fill, walking the dog every day, and finding a dominatrix who uses safe words I can pronounce.
After months of delays and after running out of excuses, I have finally moved and in the process of hitting the campaign trail. Getting to my new house was a bit of an adventure that I never want to go through again.
My GPS is old and not terribly reliable in finding the shortest distance between two points. Wyoming is a beautiful state, but has no business on a route between New Jersey and Delaware. I also manage to be lead on some unpaved roads.
I managed to get here late last night. It wasn’t until after I unloaded everything this morning that I realized I had forgotten a few things. I remembered to bring food, but none of the pots, pans, or dishes. The on;y reason why I remembered the silverware was because I had placed them in my toiletries bag. New Jersey is where my pots, pans, toothpaste, toothbrush, and shampoo are. I remembered the conditioner, but I forgot why I remembered.
It’s nice to be able to walk around town wearing a Washington Redskins jersey without being heckled by a rival team’s fans whose team is currently 0-5.
I will be giving a speech tomorrow on the Affordable Care Act (ObamaCare) and why nobody seems to be able to afford it. Coffee and pastries will be served (but you will have to pay for the coffee and pastries you consume because that is how the diner operates.)
I was hoping that everything would have gone well with the move, but it hasn’t. I will definitely be moving on Wednesday. It is going to take me a few days once I get there to set up a strategic campaign plan which will utilize my resources (or lack thereof) wisely.
My first video greeting will be posted by Sunday. The radio show will be either on Monday nights or Tuesday afternoons. Regular blgging will resume as soon as I get my internet set up in Delaware. (Or sooner if I live near someone with unsecured Wi-Fi.)