Ahmnodt Heare for President

Ahmnodt Heare For America… Ahmnodt Heare For You.

Catching Up in Politics

I’m back before I miss too much going on and have to spend an entire weekend blogging.  President Obama is in a heap of trouble.  I will make my endorsement for New York City mayor tonight.

Between “Benghazigate”, The IRS fiasco, an the AP wiretapping mess, you’re probably regretting not voting for me for President last November.  I forgive you.  Just remember this entry in 2016 before you vote for one of the poor choices the Republicans and Democrats will be nominating.  Below is how I would have prevented Obama’s scandals from becoming scandals in an Ahmnodt Heare administration:

Benghazigate: – I wouldn’t have allowed a consulate office to be opened in Benghazi.  This is because like so many other Americans, I never heard of Benghazi before the diplomats were killed.  I would have kept them in Tripoli as long as it was safe.  If it got too risky to stay, I would have gotten the navy to pick them up and ship them across the Mediterranean Sea to Italy.

The IRS: – The IRS has supposedly been targeting certain non-profit organizations that were against the Obama Administration.  To the best of my knowledge, TAMPON (Take All Money Political Out Now) was not targeted because they were considered to be more pro-Ahmnodt Heare and less anti-Barack Obama.  This probably includes businesses that did not make profits because of the Obama administration’s poor fiscal policies.  My policies would make businesses prosper and leave non-profits alone as they don’t make enough money to interest me.

AP Wiretapping: – I don’t know why anybody would wiretap the Associated Press.  The news has sucked for years now.  I don’t know of any stories that were negative against the White House until lately.  I wouldn’t wiretap anybody because I wouldn’t want to get caught.

I have spent some time thinking about who I should endorse for Mayor.  The problem is that I have two friends of my campaign running for mayor.  Jimmy McMillan is one candidate.  Though he hasn’t endorsed my campaign, I agree with him when he says the rent is too damned high.  Anthony Weiner and I don’t see eye-to-eye on all of the issues, but that did not stop him from endorsing me last year. 

The person I am endorsing for mayor doesn’t currently live in New York City, but he had worked in Gotham for years.  He has fought crime better than any of the other candidates.  While he doesn’t currently live in New York, he is currently a mayor of a small town in Rhode Island.  He has had to battle issues like stolen water and sewage dumping, so he is ready to serve the fine people of New York City.

 

Adam West for Mayor of New York City

Adam West for Mayor of New York City

 

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May 22, 2013 Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, commentary, economy, editorial, endorsement, foreign policy, humor, issues, Obama, politics, satire, scandal | , , , , , , , , , , , | Comments Off on Catching Up in Politics

2012 in Review – June

June was a slow month but it did have its good moments.  I did some campaigning in the eastern US and southeastern Canada.  Albee Thayer showed his ability to reach out to the zombie demographic.  I also received my first celebrity endorsement in a while.

Congressman Anthony Weiner caused controversy within his own party by endorsing Independent candidate Ahmnodt Heare for President.

Former Congressman Anthony Weiner caused controversy within his own party by endorsing Independent candidate Ahmnodt Heare for President.

June was a good month for campaigning in America but a bad month for campaigning in France and Germany.  Aside from confusing the last name of the President of France with a different European country, I also had problems with my laptop and phone.  The only person who was receiving my telepathic distress calls was a homeless man who was a Romney supporter.

June was also a good month for supporters to publicly show their vocal support like in the video below:

June did not end on a good note.  A heat wave in the east got to me, especially when I went to Washington DC to visit my daughter.  It was hot and humid, like something I never experienced living in DC before.

December 28, 2012 Posted by | Ahmnodt, Albee, campaign, commentary, endorsement, environment, humor | , , , | 1 Comment

Thank You for Your Continued Support

I was asked by one of my neighbors yesterday why I was running for President.  She noted the usual reasons why one would think it is not worth it to run:  No press coverage, no invitations to debates, not getting the same discounts for lap dances that politicians get, etc.  I told her that it is because there is a large segment of people who would rather see me in the White House than any Republican or Democrat.  Below are some photos posted on websites of supporters:

Browns fan from Shaker Heights, OH

How a supporter envisions what Mount Rushmore will look like in ten years after I serve my two terms.

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A couple of very nice ladies preparing for Election Night and “Orgies for Abstinence VI”.

I would like to thank John for finding these photos and sharing them with the campaign.  If you have any campaign photos you like to share, feel free to send them to me and I’ll give you a shout out in a future blog entry.

October 24, 2012 Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, endorsement, humor, politics, satire | , , , , , | 3 Comments

The Ahmnodtophobic Media

The media fears me, my campaign, and my supporters.  The few mentions I get from the media make no mention that I am running for President of the United States.  They try to make it like my occupation is Horse-and-Buggy assembly line worker or some other obselete job.  More often than not though, they choose to ignore me.  This is especially true in issues where I am stronger than either Obama or Romney.

Here is your chance to prove me wrong.  You can try one or more of the following ideas:

  • Email a letter to the editor of your local newspaper.  The letter should include why you support (or disdain) my campaign.  Please also include the link http://tinyurl.com/ahmnodt with your letter.  (The link is the shortened url for this blog.)
  • Call a political talk show.  If the host is talking about a specific topic, tell the call screener why I am better at that issue than any other candidate.  If the topic is about Obama or Romney, tell him or her why I am a better candidate.  If it is about a debate, insist that I be allowed in future debates.
  • Go to a local “Occupy” protest or a riot and carry an “Ahmnodt Heare for President” sign.  Try to get a media photographer to take a picture of you with the sign.  If that doesn’t work, get a blogger to take a picture with his or her phone.
  • Call a press conference.  Call your local media outlets and announce that you will be holding a press conference at a specific time.  Announce that you will be endorsing and voting for Ahmnodt Heare in the upcoming election.  If they ask for contact information, tell them my contact information is in my blog.

If you get mentioned in the newspaper please scan the mention and e-mail the file to ahmnodtheare @politician.com.  If it is on the web, please e-mail me the link or share it in the comments section below this blog entry.  Thank you for continued support.

October 1, 2012 Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, commentary, endorsement, humor, media, Obama, Romney, satire | , , , , , , , , , | Comments Off on The Ahmnodtophobic Media

Ahmnodt Heare! Ahmnodt Heare!

The rumor I am hearing from supporters in Charlotte is that the reason why President Obama’s nomination speech was moved from Bank of America Stadium to the Time Warner Cable Arena is because over 1,000 of my supporters were able to get tickets and they were going to let their voices heard tonight.   They were also able to sneak “Ahmnodt Heare for President” signs into the stadium and had them in storage at the stadium until a Democratic Part operative spotted the signs during a security walk-through.  They caught a supporter impersonating a security worker try to put more signs into storage.  That supporter then spilled the beans about the operation.

Most of them had their tickets between the 20-and 40 yard lines on the far half of the field from the stage.  They were ready to chant “AHMNODT HEARE!” when the Democratic faithful would chant “FOUR MORE YEARS!”.  They even said they were trying to hack into the stadium television screens to have my picture posted while President Obama made his speech.

I had no prior knowledge of the actions of my supporters nor do I tolerate breaking of laws to get the message across.  Make no mistake about it, I am nonetheless deeply flattered.

There are two reasons why this wasn’t mentioned in the news:  The first reason is because the media doesn’t want to give my campaign any publicity.  If the news ever mentioned that there was a candidate besides Obama and Romney running for President, people would be typing in that candidate’s name in search engines.  People have heard of Roseanne Barr, but most people didn’t know she was running for President until they typed her name in a search engine.  She and Cindy Sheehan are running on the “Peace and Freedom” ticket.

For those of you who found this blog entry by typing in “Roseanne Barr”, “Cindy Sheehan”, or “Reince Priebus Drunk”. welcome to my website.  Be sure to check out my platform, videos, and the celebrities who have endorsed me.

September 6, 2012 Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, Democrats, election, endorsement, humor, media, Obama, Platform, politics, satire, scandal | , , , , , , , , , , , | Comments Off on Ahmnodt Heare! Ahmnodt Heare!

Clint Eastwood’s Real Endorsement

Clint Eastwood’s subliminal endorsement goes through a clueless mainstream media ans the Republican Party Convention.

Moments before Mitt Romney formally accepted the Republican Party’s nomination for President, Clint Eastwood gave a speech.  Mr. Eastwood had a little chat with an empty chair.  People automatically assumed that chair was a bashing of President Obama.  While he did talk about Obama’s absence in policy, it was not why the chair was there.  The empty chair was a symbolic endorsement for I’m Not Here Ahmnodt Heare.  He couldn’t formally endorse me for President, especially at a party convention for which party I am not a member of.  I am an independent and not a member of any party.  I tend to be a wallflower at parties, especially at parties without booze.

Clint Eastwood was once the mayor of Carmel, California.  He was officially a Republican, but many in the party thought he was too independent for mainstream Republicanism.  He had heard more than his share of criticism over the years.  He didn’t address the critics at the time because he had a town to manage.  But Clint Eastwood never forgets.  Like a ninja in the dark, he patiently waits his chance to pounce and POW!

I like to thank Mr. Eastwood for his endorsement.  My only regret is that more people didn’t pick up on the symbolism.

September 4, 2012 Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, commentary, endorsement, humor, politics, Republicans, satire | , , , , , | 5 Comments

Be a Part of It!

Between now and next Sunday, I will be collecting short video snippets from supporters explaining why they support Ahmnodt Heare for President.  The video should be thirty seconds or less with a brief explanation why Ahmnodt Heare would be a better candidate than Barack Obama or Mitt Romney.

If you are stumped as to what to say, here are some links I hope will inspire you.

  • Issues – My position on the issues of the day.  Feel free to pick the one that inspires you the most.
  • Videos – My videos on a wide variety of topics explaining in my own words (mostly) explaining why I should be President.
  • Endorsements – For those of you who found out about my campaign from a celebrity who endorses me for President, you can briefly explain the characteristics your favorite celebrity and I have in common.
  • Puppies – who doesn’t love puppies?

Everybody loves puppies!

As soon as I compile all of the clips from supporters, I will post a composite video containing the clips and then forward the compilation to various media sources.

 

Oops, I almost forgot:  e-mail your completed clips to ahmnodtheare@politician.com

August 9, 2012 Posted by | Ahmnodt, campaign, endorsement, humor, issues, media, politics | , , , , | Comments Off on Be a Part of It!

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